To those who don't use a filter ... respectfully, WTF

That's not really how addiction works, plus the area of the brain responsible for willpower is severely compromised in an addict.

To beat an addiction you need to starve and weaken the addictive pathways within the brain, how you go about doing this doesn't really matter. If you were locked inside a room with no technology for a year, do you really think that by the end of it you'd still be just as addicted because it wasn't you keeping yourself away from the addiction? It's very admirable that you want to do it with no outside help but it's no good if six years down the line you still haven't managed to quit.

 

I don't use a filter simply I'm too tech savvy. I always find a way to bypass it when I'm horny and it's actually counter productive with me because I take it as a challenge.
I would otherwise.

 

I don't feel like a filter it takes thirty seconds to remove is worth the effort to bother with. I tried it, and the extra step is generally so miniscule it may as well not be there. The only time this was not the case is when the software broke my computer and I was forced to remove it to keep using the computer at all. I already said all this but I'll say it again.

If a lock on a door is so flimsy that simply breathing on it busts the door wide open to let anyone inside, then indeed the lock doesn't work. That's what content filters are to anyone with a moderate understanding of computers. To me, filters are not a preventative measure because they don't prevent me doing anything. Staying away from the laptop when I'm urged and staying busy to focus sexual desire away from PMO are preventative measures. Journaling to track progress, engaging with other users and introspecting about the root cause of my addiction and tackling that, are all preventative measures. Installing a plugin that I can remove with the same effort it takes to breathe is not a preventative measure. If filters work for others, then that is wonderful, but they don't work for me.

Please remember that I said "I'd have said he's baiting" not that you ARE baiting. You probably aren't, or at least not on purpose, and I came to that conclusion based on the age of your account. I would have stopped engaging by now if I thought you actually were just farming for replies by being provocative. Which to be fair, you still are being provocative, again probably accidentally, when you not-so-subtly imply you know the nature of the people you're talking to better than the people themselves. A lot of what you are saying is based on your own personal, subjective experience and assumptions.

Now, in the interests of not keeping this going for another day, I'm going to stop now. As I have nothing left to say that would not involve me just repeating myself.

 

It would have made sense to have stated all this in your very first post instead of four pages in. Would have saved you some trouble, I imagine.

 

I remember talking to someone on here a few years ago who was very experienced in recovery. He was something like 10+ years clean plus he was a volunteer with SAA and he said there's no one-size-fits-all in recovery. A problem with this forum sometimes is that some people insist that if it works for them it works for everyone but that is not necessarily the case.

 

Hey friends.

I use Covenant Eyes and find it a really useful tool to slow down and allow me to take a breath when i am feeling compulsive, this bought time is great for pulling myself out of a dangerous headspace. This alone has been a huge gift. I am looking for more people to be accountable with on the app as my current accountability partners are not active at all with checking. I also would be a new accountability partner for you. Is there any part of this website that helps link people up anonymously for mutual benefit with something like this?

 

That's a tricky scenario, but I actually disagree with you, and here's why: if someone is locked away somewhere with no access to internet (or any other media) No female interaction of any kind, or whatever the sexual preference is, say for ten years. To me, the status of the person's addiction will depend on what their mind was occupied with while they were off the grid. If he or she thought about lustful images and situations the entire time, then yes, they will absolutely be just as addicted, if not moreso, craving porn since they were away from it for so long.

 

I agree with this to an extent. I agree that there are countless ways to fight this addiction, and that many of them won't work for everyone, but I whole-heartedly disagree with all aspects of fighting this addiction aren't right for everyone. I don't ha e to look very far at all to see men who are doing things they think are good for fighting, but they're fooling themselves because it's semi-subconscious sabotage, so they can low-key act out, but act like that's not what it is. And that isn't okay for ANY addict of lust. Also, some lust addicts will say that it's a good idea to wean themselves off of porn instead of quitting cold turkey. That also is never a good idea.

 

My view, filters make things inconvenient, not impossible. For that reason it is better to just willpower your way through.

 

it really depends on the kind of addict you are. for some, they work great. for me, never.

I use deterrents, for sure. but blockers have only lead to massive binge sessions and an inner rebellion addict coming out.

Its like taking all the money away from an alcoholic thinking that will help them. Only to find out they began shoplifting booze and got arrested.

 

I’m lazy, simply put. I have an iPhone and Apple OS hates new software. I’ll find something but keeping my phone away from me at night is working…somewhat.

 

Same here. I always try to check them if they work, like i am beta tester, and then i find a loophole, and then dang!
So i stay away from them. I am much better without them.

 

To all people who doesn't use a filter because of circumvention, try Pluckeye filter. It blocks all video and pictures per default which kills all social media and other triggers. I have tried all kinds of filters in the past, and this one is the real deal which i can not bypass.

And for iOS, disable safari and app store using screentime and lock down the recovery Apple ID and screentime password using a pluckeye lockbox. There is a guide on the plucky forum on how to do this properly which i unfortunately can't link here.

There is no really excuse in not using filters my brothers. Jesus says in Matthew 5:29-30:
29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.

Matthew 16:24-25:
24 ... “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

Amen.

 

Religious stuff aside, just because we are not using filters does not mean that we are giving up in recovering from PMO.
for some it *HELPS US* to stay sober to *NOT* use filters...so why would you be against that??

"Whoevers nut hath not busteth shall cast the first stone." - John 8:7

Addiction recovery isn't the same for everyone. Filters have never helped me, in the years I've been fighting this. I could say all the truly awful ways I overcame them, but that would just give people here more ideas for how to relapse and Im not going to do that.

 

I never said that.

I'm not against anything if it helps you specifically. But in general I believe that total abstinence is key to recovery and a good filter is required for this if you are staying online.

Did you try Plucky? It's really hard to bypass even if you are a coder. Using filters puts a distance between you and triggers. Personally I was unable to even have a smartphone/internet connection at home due to relapse risk before I started using this filter.