marriage life and 20 years worth of Porn

You have taken two very important steps towards recovery already. First you have admitted that you have a problem and how severely your actions are hurting your partner. As you can see from many of the comments on here many addicts struggle to ever get there. You are not minimalizing her pain, you don’t blame her and you are not making excuses. Second you realize that you need help and have reached out for it by joining NoFap. I suspect the other addicts in recovery can help you along your journey a lot more than me. My advice as a SO is be honest. Be honest to a fault to the point it’s annoying. Answer all of her questions no matter how uncomfortable it makes you. If she tells you what she needs to forgive you do it without question or complaint. If she does not tell you ask her what she needs. Talk about it when she needs. Don’t get angry or defensive listen and tell her how sorry you are. Don’t push her to forgive you. Recognize she will do that on her own timeline which will likely be a lot longer than yours. Try your hardest to put her feelings first. She may be angry she may rage and say horrible things don’t fight back let her rage tell her you understand. Offer to go to counseling. Offer her access to all your devices. Don’t push for sex. Tell her how beautiful she is and do things she enjoys. Follow through on your promises keep your word. That’s the only way to rebuild the trust you have broken. Good luck!