I WILL break free myself from this curse of PMO.

Hello everyone one
I'm 19 . Since age of 13 I started masturbation. At I was ignorant what it really is but since I found pleasure out of it , I did it . At that time I thought lewdly about girls in my mind and masturbate 2-3 times a day and it goes on. But I don't know the my body was damaging severely. When I noticed these things I reduce the frequency of masturbation 1-2 times per week. But mind is going through hell . All those bad effects like lack of memory , low self-esteem, self guilt, urge to his from everyone etc. are crept to my mind .
Eventually I was started to weakening both in study and track field due to my lack of motivation.

Like this time goes on . But when I turned late 14 my father noticed the state of my body ( like I become skinny, there dark patches below my eye etc.) and thought I was gone astray because I am one of the best students in track field so I used to be very fit . I remember on republic day when I don't want to attend republic day ceremony in school (because I don't want to show my face infront of others) my father noticed this and started to probe me . When he found out what his guess is true he so angry that he scold me for 2 hrs about how it destroys the moral life of a person. At that time I was so scared by the consequences that I decided to break this curse . Then my first rebooting started . I was quit everything that damaged my self (like hard mode in nofap) . I hate masturbation, love relationships so much that I break my friendship with those who has relationship with girls (at that time I don't know about pornography, so I have nothing to do with this) . I never made girl a friend . I mainly focussed on study(to get good grade) and track field to become my previous fit self. This goes on and I broke this curse temporarily because soon I face another problem "night-fall and wet-dreams" (after I quit masturbation for month). I became so frustrated that I tried to solve it very badly. But no matter what I do night fall occurred in every 1-2 months. It is quite a blow to my efforts. But it doesn't waver my will to completely eradicate this thing from my life.

Time goes on I turned 15 . This year is very special because I was preparing for my board. So I don't have much time for anything except study(but night fall occurred in same frequency but I don't mind it ) . If you see except night-fall I never fap for 2 years. I was very satisfied . But something bad happened in the month of my board exam . Because of so much stress I masturbate 10-12 times on that month but I don't care about it because my board exam . But in the end I topped 8th rank in my district. So all-in-all I was very happy . I praised by school, family, relatives(quite a glory). So I forgot about the severe blow I received. But I started to break this curse with all my heart. I believe this will be my new life .

And I turned 16 . A admitted in a very reputed college in our state. But I don't know my worst time is coming because I exposed to a new environment, get free access to internet, got a brand new Android phone and so on. I met many good students on par with me and above me . But most frustrated thing is that they are many in relationships and girl friends but they are quite good at study and even better than me . So I became lonely and lose my interest in study and not many track opportunities . So what left me and my smartphone and internet. Then I exposed to pornography , started masturbation and so on. My study quality, my health and social connections worsened every month .

I can't explain the whole story because it will be very long .
But last results are
- performed poorly in my inter exam.
-physical and mental health become poor.
-failed entrance exams .

My 16 and 17 are worst . Masturbation frequency became 4-5 times per month.
When I turned 18 masturbation, night fall all-in all ejaculation frequency remains 4-5 times per month. This year is quite a nightmare because I not admitted in any university.

Now I am 19 . Everything is still the same . I have urge to masturbate in every 10-14 days . It became like a habitual pattern. Last time I masturbated is 8 th August. I got depressed over it and consulted one of my friend because this year I admitted into university(not reputed) and don't want to go through help like in 16 and 17. He directed me to nofap . I read concepts of nofap and quite impressed.

So this is my story with p-m out of p-m-o and coming to NoFap .
I hope you guys will be with me in my journey to break this curse.

I am in challenge of "abstain August".
Looking forward to the journey with all of you and nofap .