Androgynous femme guy: gay or trans or mixed-up?

Hi NoFap.
I am 19 year old person (assigned as "male" at birth) that is seriously confused about my sexuality and gender, and my search for healthy answers led me to porn sites that now occupy many many hours of my day.
I day-to-day present as female, which is super easy for me as I am tiny and skinny and feminine anyway.
I have done so since I was about 15.
I only date men.
I am not sure if I am scared of girls or I am not attracted to them, but I don't date them.

My life is being wasted in the search for answers --- not in search of healthy answers, but rather getting sucked into porn at 15/16 years old. Porn will confirm ANYTHING you want to confirm and that is why I am here. I need my own brain back.

I need to break porn addiction and genuinely seek the truth about me.
I hope to break my porn addiction here.
I start today. No more porn!!

 

I agree!! It makes no difference. I am me

I keep worrying about labels, but you are right. It just complicates things.

Yay!!!!

I think this is very true. I like men much more than women ....in a way of attraction, so in that way maybe I am gay. I like feminine clothes and makeup and being seen as a woman, and having people see me as a woman, I like that. So in that way maybe I am trans.

Your point is well taken. Stop the labels. Sort my porn addiction out FIRST.

Thank you, you are so nice to write this advice!!!

 

Well THAT was quick. So much for intent!!!
Failed on first night I am devastated. I thought I could go for at least a few days!!!!

A guy I dated called and was teasing me and flirting. He wanted to go out but I said no (he is very aggressive and big and can be scary if he doesn't get what he wants.) We talked but I was able to convince him I could not see him. He put ideas in my head tho.

Spoiler: ...losing control...

After off the phone I kept thinking of him (he is very Alpha and very fit, and even scary it is alluring) and I ended up playing w myself. I have no self discipline!!!
I need to get more than just porn under control. I have a very active fantasy brain and I am very attracted to older men that are Sugar-Daddy types. I was his sugar baby for a while and he spoiled me nicely. This guy triggered a bunch of fantasy that I could not control.

I deleted my account on my 3 porn-sites tonight. I am so angry at myself. I am so very weak to suggestions.

 

Hello and welcome!

We are glad to have you as a part of our community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

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If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

You can also take part in one of the many challenges available. It can be a tremendous help. Challenges

There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here to help you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothing but the best!

 

Hey, welcome to the forum! nice to have you alongside us fighting the good fight! : )
I strongly advise you to be active on your profile; start by choosing an avatar and then make daily posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you
encouragement/support.
You should also highly consider creating a public journal (in the appropriate sectionfor you ) and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along on your journey!

★ People love to communicate in the profiles section and also the journal section. We need more supportive people though, we could always use your help and in return receive some as well!

Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!

 

At least I am not alone on this quest, thank you for the encouragement!

OMG thank you so much --- these are very powerful affirmations.
"I am who I am, and that is good enough."
I feel so much guilt over the direction my life has taken in the past year. What were once childhood fantasies have manifest as a very strong reality. It has all come on so quickly. I need to take this one step at a time

 

My JOURNAL: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...inity-porn-sugar-daddies.244607/#post-2186216

 

I posted it, thank you: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...inity-porn-sugar-daddies.244607/#post-2186216

 

ThanQ so much!!

 

Brilliant insights!!!! AGREE