150 Days - Feels like a head replacement

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by thel00ker, Dec 23, 2017.

  1. thel00ker

    thel00ker Fapstronaut

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    Well I've been thinking about what to write next, after my 90 days post I just tried to pay attention towards how my life was playing out and I think this is the first time I feel this kind of happiness.

    This week, I had to study a lot, gave my last 2 finals on thursday. Now i'm an architect.

    This last month I officially introduced the girl I was dating to my parents, the rest of my family and all my friends. Now I can call her my girlfriend, the first one I ever had.

    I also went on small trip to the west of my beautiful country with her and another couple of our age, we camped it the middle of the mountains in one of the best nights of my life.

    On this trip I reconnected with photography, my strongest passion and understood that it is something that I never have to give up.

    I'm having a lot of sex, with someone I really trust and it's the most fun and intimate I've been with someone of the opposite gender, it's beautiful. Sex with my girlfriend improves each day.

    I had a crazy party with all my university friends who graduated with me, here I invited my long time school friends. Both groups came together and had a great time.

    I had a lot of people come to me and tell me how much they appreciate me and told me how valuable I am, lifting my soul and spirit. I've also had the courage to tell them how much I value them, and how much I love all my friends.

    I'm feeling very connected with my body, with my emotions, good and bad. And it's been amazing to express my happiness and let myself feel pain. Both emotions burn brighter than ever. In the most beautiful way.

    I'm feeling very excited about my future. Where to go next, what to do with myself.

    In times of great tension, before I would crawl into my bedroom with my computer to masturbate and try to forget, I now just feel great tension and nervousness, what I'm supposed to feel, and it's fantastic.

    Going through life feels like a rollercoaster. Emotionally it's real, pure. My feelings are as strong as ever. I feel young.

    The year is ending, before I would start thinking about a way to fix my life, how to stop porn use, how to quiet my mind, "another year flies by". Now I proud to say that 2017 was one of my best years and I cannot say that I didn't enjoy the hell out of it.

    Christmas is coming, due to my losses it was always a very painful holiday, Now i'm looking forward to it, thinking about how to enjoy my family and friends.

    I feel confident about my body and about my personality, I can now be almost naked in front of anybody and not be conscious about it.

    Most importantly I forgot what porn was all about. I don't miss it, I sometimes crave it, but those thoughts fire up so weakly that I cannot understand what I was thinking about before.

    I could speak for hours about each thing, but it's too much. I just can't understand how much of my life changed in so little time. 150 days without porn, and now I can't even recognize myself. I look in the mirror and feel proud.

    I wish I could go back and give myself a taste of this feeling. I'm sure that it would convince me to just quit for real and in a number of days start feeling life like never before.

    Good luck everyone, wish you the best. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
     
  2. Shykneeb

    Shykneeb Fapstronaut

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    great job man. Keep it up. Stay vigilant!
     
    Don Gately, sakeen and thel00ker like this.
  3. Nomar

    Nomar Fapstronaut

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    Awesome! Way to go man. Thank you for the inspiration.
     
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  4. noonoon

    noonoon Fapstronaut

    Love it! Inspiring. Good work
     
  5. jorg78

    jorg78 Fapstronaut

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  6. |444|

    |444| Fapstronaut

    Very inspiring thank you for sharing!
     
  7. Just

    Just Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations and thank you for sharing your story, helping others to realize what is possible with a clear mind. Feels great to be at day 69, cannot wait to hit 150. Happy holidays!
     
    Igaleksus likes this.

  8. Amazing progress man.

    I relapsed once yesterday after 30 days of nofap lol. That's the second time I've done that too.

    I don't get it. I don't feel any difference at all. Even when I was on my 30 days streak.

    First few days felt good, but after that, nothing! It felt exactly like it used to feel before. It just kept feeling worse and worse till I gave up and relapsed.

    What am I doing wrong? How come others are seeing so many success stories while I see no difference in my life at all?
     
  9. thel00ker

    thel00ker Fapstronaut

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    thank you! I will!

    It's my pleasure man! thanks!

    thanks!

    thank you!

    my pleasure thanks!

    69 days is an amazing score! congratulations and happy holidays!
     
  10. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

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  11. thel00ker

    thel00ker Fapstronaut

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    Hey man, I didn't feel much difference at 30 days either. actually I was pretty anxious back then. It's not like leaving porn will automatically make you happy. Are you doing something else to be happy apart from leaving porn?

    Leaving porn will give you great freedom and clarity, to turn your life into whatever you want and connect with all the people around you. But that feeling takes time and specially determination to change and leave those bad habits behind!

    You tell me that 30 days make no difference, but you did start to feel worse and worse, this indicates that there is tendency to fall back to porn when you're feeling sad, anxious or lonely. When porn is gone, you'll see clearly where that sadness is coming from and hopefully you'll be able to address it directly. Remember porn is just numbing you down.

    Give it another try! but this time be active about the changes you have to make in your life in order to be happy, be conscious about your defects and plan ahead to improve yourself. Start now! and when new year comes, you'll be a week ahead lol.
    Good luck man!
     
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  12. thel00ker

    thel00ker Fapstronaut

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    haha thanks man!
     
    Runtilmylegsdropoff likes this.
  13. It feels like I'm torturing myself for nothing :/

    I have been exercising, trying to be more social, etc. But none of those things seem to be working at all :/
     
  14. thel00ker

    thel00ker Fapstronaut

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    hey man!
    what do you mean by working?
    what would you like to achieve?
     
  15. WeWillMakeIt

    WeWillMakeIt Fapstronaut

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    I got the same feelings after day ~20.
    28 days ago i started my streak, i cut down the suggar (sweets - i was addicted to them), i cut down red bulls (addicted to them),i cut down coffee, i cut weed (i was vaping very small amounts, just to stable my mood, but i did that daily) and i started to take cold showers.
    first 7-20 days were good. Last 8 days are one of the worst 8 days in my life (depression and anxiety) since i don't mask that any more with antidepressants (i was on them 1 year ago), sweets, red bulls, weed and PMO.

    Words can't describe the bad mood i am feeling. It's not about thoughts, i can "catch" them since i meditate a lot. But it's not thoughts on conscious level. Those are creepy feelings on subconscious level.
    It'a cristmass. I have good job. Good girlfriend. I am 30 and phisicly healthy. But that mood, my friend, is pushing me on the edge of suicide.

    And i will tell you my plan. I will keep on pushing.
     
  16. Igaleksus

    Igaleksus Fapstronaut

    Great post, bro. Really motivating.
     
  17. Seeker401

    Seeker401 Fapstronaut

    Great post! Thanks for sharing and inspiring. It's stories like yours that make me want to continue on what can, at times, feel like a dark path.
     
  18. sknnyjns

    sknnyjns Fapstronaut

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    Hey man congratulations on your 150 days! Thats a massive achievement. What would you say is the biggest difference you noticed between 90 and 150 days?
     
  19. SanityOverVanity

    SanityOverVanity Fapstronaut

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    This sounds all too familiar. And the stuff about being truly happy, honestly it's surreal. Blissful almost.

    I recently realised that feeling is the absence of the usual shame and guilt I'd feel during PMO. Since shame and guilt are now gone it's just serenity.

    Well done dude, keep pushing.
     
  20. I'm willing to push, man. I really am.

    But to be very honest, I barely saw any "benefits".

    I felt like I was torturing myself for no reason. Even my exams suffered because of nofap :/

    I wish there was some kind of rock solid proof that nofap works.....

    The success stories don't quite cut it for me anymore.
     

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