Today is day 51 towards 60 90 and 120 Kind of tired right now just kind of making it through the day if there was a very longday a lot of driving a lot of sitting in the vehicle lot of discussion with me and mywife ended up sleeping in my own room last night cuz I just might impulses are alittle too strong butcompulsive crap
Today is day 52 of 60 90 and 120 and I would rather start over again only if I put Icy Hot on my testicles and slap on the ping pong paddle
28 days clean on hard mode. I have NO clue how i made it this far other than the grace of God. I fooled around with my fiancé last night, but i did not O. Honesty and aligning of our goals saved me from O, as she doesn’t want me to have one and i don’t either. We’re in a conundrum where we know that God created sex/fooling around for our spouses, bur we’re engaged. A lot less motivation to not let loose. This is our battle. With the rate we’ve been fooling around (about once a week) idk how we’ll make it to October 20th, wedding day
today is day 53 of 60 90 and 120 hopefully everything is going to start getting a little bit easier soon I have a tentative right now then swap 1 deal for another by drinking a little bit too much the agreement as we only have like one or two drinks I've been doing like 3 or 4 when I'm feeling antsy or whatever so I'm trying to avoid responding to the urges so I shouldn't be I got to conquer that orders to that's all it is the same thing as the dopamine in my brain is trying to cover up for me I'm trying to use alcohol the cover up for not having to feel certain things too I remember feeling is human and it's normal
I feel really good. My first reboot was 31 days but felt awful. I had massive headaches etc. The first time is literally a purge. You make 90 or 120 the first time through you are a better man than me
See that's why I was being the wife decided to go a hundred twenty because my first 30 or so days were the worst like you said it was a purge so real reboot would take another 90 days so I literally had zero porn zero masturbation orgasm next Monday would be 60 so around 60 you do start to feel better that's kind of what I'm asking that's halfway
I'll go ahead and sign on to my WhatsApp and you can be my AP dude I need one I'm going to be sleeping in my own room for the next 8 days now
Foxislander, i really appreciate you contributing to my blog and relating to me. I feel you on the alcohol thing.. it’s like if i can’t have an O then I’ll have a drink instead. I have to remind myself that sobriety is reality, and reality is that God speaks to me and i can speak to Him. I find i have to be pretty sober to connect with God. Also, do you think you could use a bit more punctuation (.,? I think it would help me follow your messages a bit better
Got through day 29. God still hasn’t really shown me how I’m going to go through with our engagement without getting into a sexual frenzy with my fiancé. The damn is cracking and i don’t know how to patch it up.
I will do okay. I'm sorry that I don't punctuate very much, perhaps it's because I use the voice control and I just babbles. But just for your sake I shall do that, make it so. I appreciate you pointing out my errors. LOL
Good morning, today is a 54 of 60 towards 90 towards 120 little bit of a tough day yesterday kind of down a little bit and I'm flatlining a little bit not sure otherwise doing okay
Through day 30 woo! A little tipsy but extra honest. Very little temptation today except when i woke up and during lunch break. Both times i dreamed about my fiancé. I handed a little more power back to God today. What i mean is i consulted Him when i was feeling hurt for her mean comments this weekend. I prayed out of desperation and was reminded of the selflessness of God’s son. Instead of focusing on my hurts i focused on serving her. In all your way acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.