Watching porn with a partner

This is ludicrous.
First off... If you can't orgasm with a partner... You have DE.
Which if you can preform to your hand and M to P then that's, specifically, PIED.
Sorry, but it's true.
Especially if you haven't orgasmed to a partner for 3 years.
Adding porn to your relationship will only make it worse.
It will make her feel worse, eventually... Being cut from the picture, which is just a eventual... If you don't believe me... Read around.
You should cut porn out entirely.
Do a reboot.
Otherwise you risk never orgasmimg with a person, again.
And sorry if that's incredibly blunt.
But as a SO who is with a guy with PIED... I thought I'd let you know my two Cents.
I used to be OK with porn in my relationship... And it literally almost killed our entire sexual relationship as well as his sexual function.
We aren't alone.
There is a whole section here of stories of PAs like this.
You don't have to listen, but I couldn't not share.
Best of luck, whatever you decide.

 

DE Delayed Ejaculation
ED Erectile Dysfunction
PIED Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction
PA Porn Addict

As a PA, I think thi is a terrible idea (and I think Kenzi pretty much nailed as to why). You need real sex and that is not what porn propagates. Just the opposite. It is good you can have sex with your wife--some of us have/had trouble in this regard. I urge you stop the PMO (Porn Masturbation Orgasm) or you could wind up in the same boat.

I think by using porn to climax with your wife you may do serious damage to her self esteem and your relationship. Is it worth the risk?

 

DE is Delayed Ejaculation... And I meant that one.
As in your so delayed it never comes.
PA is porn addict.
And of course she wants to be included in sex and wants to please you.
But watching porn together will go with you getting up to porn and having sex, but still DE unless you maybe M or are watching P and not her all the way to your just jerking off next to her and she's not even touching you and she is crying weeks and months from now and you are both fighting and probably not together anymore.
So, save your relationship and reboot.
It's my opinion.
And if you want others opinions, read around or ask some of the SOs who left for the reasons I just listed.
Hell, it's why I almost left and I asked for watch porn together too.
It's just... Such a bad idea.
And you can always try karezza or something like that to increase intimacy without worrying about orgasm.
There are other things to do.

 

Good question.
How much confusion or addiction does it need to have the idea watching porn with your wife?

 

He changed.
He showed me physical proof every day.
And feel free to ask whatever.
But I did almost leave...
He had a realization that this was a problem.
It was the big game changer I guess.
He's been sober since.

 

Porn within a relationship?
Defenitely NO.
lly
Imho a relationship is all about intimicy. The closer 2 people gets to each other, the stronger the experience of the sexuality will be. If I may speak for myself, nothing is giving more pleasure that totally give yourself to your partner, fully trust each other and feeling totallly safe with each other.

Forget about porn in your relationship. Stop focussing on the orgasm. Focus on your own process, your own inner problems and mental blocks.

And you better pray together, than watch P together.
From now on P stands for Pray

 

yeah don't do that.

 

Don't do it.

 

When I was much younger I watched porn with a gf. But I spent the whole time worrying that any enjoyment I showed could upset her and I certainly didn't enjoy the experience. She, however, came many times - she was a pretty laid back chick. I have done it a few times since but it never did anything for me. It just never made any sense - why would anyone want to watch people having sex when there's a perfectly good, naked human being right next to you to have your own sex with...?

As for doing it when you have an obvious problem? Completely nuts for the reasons @Kenzi has perfectly explained.

I fear nothing good could ever come of following this path. I hope common sense and experience prevails.

 

Don't introduce that shit into your relationship. I knew a dude who introduced his wife to all kinds of kinky stuff, porn, bondage whatever. When she cheated on him years later he couldn't understand it. I was like, "dude, you're a fucking idiot. You trained her to do this." Don't be that guy.

 

I don't know. I'd be willing to bet that there were other issues in the marriage aside from participating in "kinky stuff".

Agree with this. I've watched it with my wife in the past a couple times. Definitely didn't add anything to the experience from my perspective.

 

We are Addicts here.

Try asking, "I am an alcoholic. Is it okay if I go out drinking, as long as it is with friends?"

If you are a porn addict, no porn in moderation, no porn with your girlfriend, no porn period!!!

 

Yes. I also included porn. He turned her into a sex addict. Taught her to enjoy the fantasy of cheating and then wondered why she cheated. Again, what an asshole.

 

Bingo. And, @noonoon that's kinda true, harsh as it sounds. We should guard our marriages against any influence that might deteriorate the relationship.

P will have the same impact on many men, as well.. if not all? It creates unfulfilling patterns for seeking risky behavior and eventual infidelity with actual people. Lots of paths that way involving intermediary steps and none of them are good. It's scary how it's all so accessible these days, one click away, one swipe with the finger on a phone. Which mathematically equals Death for the marriage at every turn. Poision thorns ready to quietly stab and then destroy the entire life through both the insidious impact and the lure to go and get more poison. Let us be vigilant!

 

DUDE THAT IS THE ADDICTION TALKING. THAT IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING EVER. LET IT GO MAN. LET IT GO! GO COLD TURKEY AND CUT PORN FOR GOOD. ANTI DEPRESSANT CAN INCREASE THE INABILITY TO EJACULATE BUT MAN YOU SOUND LIKE A RATIONALIZING ADDICT RIGHT NOW. LEAVE THAT CRAP ALONE AND DARE NOT SUBJECT HER TO SUCH DEPRAVITY!

 

YOU ARE ASKING FOR THE PERSON THAT YOU ARE HURTING THE MOST BESIDES YOURSELF WITH YOUR PORN ADDICTION, TO VALIDATE YOUR IRRESPONSIBILITY. SHE WILL RESENT YOU FOREVER. IT IS TIME FOR TRANSFORMATION MAN. YOU CAN DO IT. OTHER WISE I WILL KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR YOU IN THE RELAPSE SECTION IF YOUR PRIDE PERMITS. WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!