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Emotional distance

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by BB7378, Jun 12, 2018.

  1. BB7378

    BB7378 Fapstronaut

    So I've really been struggling with emotional distance and trying to connect with my SO and my children. I think this is a behaviour from PMO that was present when I was doing that. I always looked passed them to see the sex in everything else. I haven't watched porn in 6 months so why is this behaviour still present? Is this just me or are there other PA's that had this problem?
     
  2. TryingHard2Change

    TryingHard2Change Distinguished Fapstronaut

    Same problem here....especially with my wife -- but she has strict walls of separation up...so emotional distance is expected. But if her walls were not up, I'm not sure it would be easy to emotionally connect.
     
  3. Six months is a great start to a better P-free life. Don't let yourself be discouraged because things aren't progressing as quickly as you'd like. Think about how long you were in the 'porn fog'...it won't reverse itself in a fraction of that time.

    What kinds of things are you doing to help your recovery besides abstaining from P? Are you learning what pushed you towards the addictive thinking/acting out in the first place? Are you actively trying to deal with difficult emotions when they arise instead of automatically trying to push them aside or distract yourself?

    I believe mindfulness is a very important element in recovery. For some, it may take some time to get it down because, throughout their addiction, they've gotten very good at the opposite of mindfulness (whatever that's called.o_O)
     
  4. moonesque

    moonesque Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    P addiction is a symptom. Now that it is actively not dragging down yourself, you have the opportunity to think and see a little more clearly. Use that time to think about why P addiction became a problem for you, that will lead you to the source of your behaviors.
     

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