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26 y/o Addicted to Porn

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by FlyingPizza, May 31, 2018.

  1. FlyingPizza

    FlyingPizza Fapstronaut

    Hi there. I guess the first step is to admit the problem. I'm a 26-year-old woman and I’m addicted to porn and masturbation. I have been aware of porn since I was 11 or 12, but I was exposed to sexual situations much earlier. As a result, I spend most of my waking hours thinking of sex. Ironically, sex has always been painful for me. I have tried it with different partners, but it always felt like I was being split in half, so I ended up shying away from dating and intimacy entirely because I felt like a total failure as a woman. I substituted relationships with porn and masturbation.

    So, no bueno.

    It’s gotten so bad in the past few months that it’s begun to interfere with my daily life. I feel the urge to masturbate even when I’m working (I haven’t actually watched porn or masturbated at my workplace, thank goodness.) Also, it turns out that pixels are not good substitutes for actual human companionship. (Go figure.)

    I’m sick and tired of this. I want to be able to go somewhere and not be craving masturbating. I want to be able to focus on something that’s not porn. I want to go out with a guy and develop an intimate relationship, and not be in pain when we have sex.

    So that’s it. I’ve had it. I’m quitting porn, masturbation and orgasms for 6 months, at least. I’m going to the doctor to find out what the hell is wrong with my genitals, that can’t do what they’re supposed to do. I’m taking my life and sexuality back!

    (Sorry for any grammatical errors or weird phrases. English is not my first language.)
     
  2. NamoBuddha

    NamoBuddha Fapstronaut

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    Hi @FlyingPizza
    Welcome to the forum. Admitting the problem is really a big and brave step to quit PMO. Masturbation can bring many harmful effects to life such as brain fog, tiredness, bad relationship etc.
    I recommend you to create your journal on reboot section and come daily for writing down what you experience on the day. It helps you to understand your strength and weakness by thinking deeply before you write it down. Once you understand your weakness and strength, you will figure out your approaches to improve yourself. In addition, you will have connections with people here and you can ask for help if you have any question.
    Moreover, you could read success stories to see what others' experience on this issue. Their problems and improvements on NoFap journey is very valuable knowledge for you. Here is one.

    I hope you will get rid of PMO soon and have a bright life.

    All the best,
    NamoBuddha
     
    FlyingPizza likes this.
  3. FlyingPizza

    FlyingPizza Fapstronaut

    Hi @NamoBuddha
    Thank you for your advice. I have read the post you linked and it certainly has a lot of vital information. And you're right, I think a journal will help me. I'll make sure to start one this weekend.

    All the best,
    FlyingPizza
     
    NamoBuddha likes this.
  4. Hi. Welcome to forum!

    Make sure you crate a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

    I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

    Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!
     
    FlyingPizza likes this.
  5. FlyingPizza

    FlyingPizza Fapstronaut

    Thank you for your kind words. I have created a journal. I'll look into meditation, last time I tried it, I was unable to focus or let go of my thoughts. I would become fixated on them. I'll have to develop a plan to learn in properly.

    Once more, thank you!
     
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