It can range from "she's quite attractive, oh crap I've been staring haven't I! Look somewhere else, idiot!" to "nice [body part] and [body part] but [body part] is just okay, but if she went to the gym a little more..." to "I bet she'd love it if I [sex act]. She'd say she's not that slutty but deep down I can tell she wants whatever I'd give her." I think the former is most common among non addicts. Addicts look at her and assess her like she's porn, pretty much, which amounts to "how does she physically match up with my current desires and needs," and "here's the porn scenario I'd put her in."
And then they tell us they were looking at the nice convertible on the other side of that sweet sweet ass but we aren't idiots, are we?
one thing i think needs to be recognized is that guys, even non-PA guys (if such a mythical creature actually exists) get a jolt of something pleasant (probably dopamine) in the brain just from seeing an attractive girl. it's genetically in our nature. i know women appreciate a hot guy and can ogle and stare too, but IMO the hit of "feel good juice" is probably different. it literally can interrupt your thinking, almost involuntarily. we know this from adverts that "grab" attention with a female body to sell something. up to that point is entirely a limbic response, no PFC involvement at all. since the juice feels good (in an unspecified way) it is also 100% logical to keep looking in order to get more of the feel good juice. it is at this point that the PFC can engage and impose values and mores. i don't know that this is talked about much or recognized, but IMO it's important to understand. not making excuses. just want this out there.
Before NoFap I would create a lot of sex fantasies. Now I try to avoid it, 5 second rule helps me with this.
but to answer the question that was asked... can't speak for other guys, but for me it's "wow - nice _____(not just T&A, but whatever makes her standout: face, legs, stomach, presence, sexy attitude) ! i bet she's hot in the sack" and that's about it. i personally don't imagine her naked, or inject her in some favorite scene. the looking, all by itself, just feels good. i just admire her and most likely her parts (complete objectification), if possible i admire her from all angles and motions. i'll take whatever views or glimpses are given. Honestly there's just not much PFC brain activity. I'm sure it's way more boring than what most women expect we are thinking.
For me personally, I'm thinking "why is she torturing me with that outfit??" I hate that feeling of shame I get when oogling and it sometimes makes me wish that women didn't dress so sexy these days. Makes me feel creepy, but we honestly can't help but to look, like rubbernecking when driving by an accident scene.
"Don't stare. Don't stare! You're staring! Ok look somewhere else now! Do it! Alright. Well done. Jeez, she did have a nice (whatever) though." As a recovering PA, learning (among many things) about how much you objectified women and shouldn't, while simultaneously developing an increased appreciation for real-world women, I challenging. But I don't think I have a major issue with ogling. Can always get better though!
I love this question bc I always wish I could read ppls minds! I'd love to know what women think too. Sometimes I feel like I'm getting dirty looks from other women and I am really curious why. I am actually a really nice person. I wonder if I look like a bitch or something...lol
Hmm..so which is worse? That could be another topic question... Cause see I think I'm a harmless flirt but know when to shut it down. I can flirt w ppl I don't necessarily find attractive but I'm sure not mentally f@";$& them. Whereas some guys stated they are having sexual fantasies just by looking at a woman.
@Broken3 @Sadgirl @SOSo @Bel @TooMuchTooSoon All I have learned from this thread so far is Men are disrupted by porn addiction and its turned them Completely unimaginative. No Wonder we are finding it so difficult to progress in the bedroom.
No, I meant the question we are answering... It's not that hard to guess what men think about so why stare at them to try to figure it out... Lololololol PS, your bitch face is probably sexy
I think it's mostly due to the fact that evolution wired us to not only be visually attuned sexually but also made us want to put our seed anywhere we can. So yeah we see a hottie and we get a jolt and our lizard brain takes over for a few seconds. Unimaginative? Maybe some of us. What I always think is...well better not say. This is a porn recovery forum.
