hey guys I'm 27 years old, and I've been addicted to PMO since I was 12. I'm from India and have been living in the States since I was 2, just for background. In my family, having a girlfriend as an adolescent and having premarital sex is frowned upon. I always got made fun of in middle school and high school for not having a girlfriend and being a virgin. I didn't and still don't mind waiting till marriage but it killed me not being able to pursue a girl I liked, especially when I could see that she liked me back. PMO was the way for me to cope with that stress. I wish to God that wasn't the way I coped but sadly it is. I have never gone behind my parents' back and had a girlfriend but the fact that I would be going online like this and then getting off haunted me. Needless to say, the rush from PMO is addicting. Not only does it make me feel listless and lethargic, but I feel like my view of women has become perverse. A couple years ago, I had stumbled onto the app Whisper. While I used it mainly just for the LOLs, it ended up starting a whole new addiction altogether. On that app, you can chat anonymously with other people, and while most of my conversations with other people were fun and clean... some of them led me down really bad PMO streaks. On there, there are groups that allow you to indulge in some perverse tastes like roleplay. The feeling of exhilaration from actually being able to sext with a real girl and then exchange pictures is something that P just doesn't fulfill. While I knew it wasn't right, I just couldn't let go. thank God, I've deleted that app and I have been off it for about three weeks now. I feel no need to get it back. I have tried quitting cold turkey and sometimes for a month I would succeed, only to relapse worse than ever. It has come to the point where I do it twice or thrice a day, and the only time I would really take a break would be when I'd have a difficult time getting it up. I'm currently on that kind of break right now, and God introduced me to this community so that I can make a permanent change. Cause it is time that the demon be exorcised. Deep down, I do believe women are not just sexual objects. They are human beings too, I'm not saying this to sound like some nice guy but I'm the kind of guy who's a hopeless romantic. And I do want a genuine emotional connection with a lady one day that's not solely based on how physically attractive she is. I know that stopping PMO will help me achieve a healthier mindset and a healthier life overall. Sorry for the long post guys. I really needed to get this off my chest. I've always been told that in order to achieve something, you've gotta do something you've never done. So here's day 1. God willing, let's get this.
Hey @marathiman , I'm nobody special on here. Just a regular user saying, "welcome". There is so much support on this forum, the profiles and the various groups. It works if you work it. I don't offer advise. I offer only my ESH (experience, strength and hope). My ESH is that NoFap is about action and that meant work for me. It is not about "not doing something", for me, it is about working my program. Work it? Oh yeah. There's work to be done, that's what's worked for me. Two things I've found necessary. 1. I had to Learn the NoFap Program. 2. Getting involved with the community on here was vital to help my recovery. Learn the NoFap Program The resources listed on the "New Users: List of Rebooting Resources" helped me find my way around the reasons behind the program and the terms used. They are: Download the free Getting Started guide. Set up a PMO-Counter Badge. More info here! Basic introduction to the science of porn addiction! Basic information about rebooting and how our challenges can help you recover from PMO. This is the most important page to read. If you only can read one page, read this one. About NoFap. Watch this video - it is an epic intro resource if you want to get particular details about porn addiction and how it changes how your brain works. This is a good light-weight video about porn addiction. Read through the journal sections and see what other rebooters have experienced. It is good to know what to expect, otherwise the "chaser effect", "the surge", or the "flatline" might throw you off. If you come across vocabulary that you can't understand, check out our rebooting glossary of terms. GET ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR HABITS! Sign up for a peer accountability partner. Otherwise if you want more professional-hosted solutions, check out NoFap Premium or Reboot Camp. If you can afford to invest in yourself, these are great options. You can find this same list on the top of the forum you posted this message on at - the "New to NoFap" forum. Get Involved with the Community The community has been my lifeline. I've found journals I love, people who are very supportive and a place where I could get to work helping in a small way others. Remember, I'm just a normal user with no magic powers. But, I can: Read Journals, and comment when I have ESH Find people I admire and stay in touch via their profiles Pick a forum and make sure every post gets and answer. I can't answer them all, but that's good - different opinions make for a better group. Post in my journal (I could be better at it - but I do milestone posts at least) To make a journal go to the section listed by age and start one. Keep all your journal posts in one thread. But, for random thoughts, you can create a new thread. Looking forward to seeing you around on the forums, --> L PS – I Think of pmo like a wolf. If I Stay near the center of the group with the winners the wolf has a more difficult time finding me. But, stray near the edges of the community by not working my program and the wolf can pick me off.
One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. Reading other's stories with their victories and even defeats is a big part of my program. I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work. Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few: @Barry Barnstein - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/138399/ --- @Freedom Fighter - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144710/ --- @mankiam33 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/164671/ --- @Inqonyama - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/166981/ --- @bartbar - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/163785/ --- @Alikersantti - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155162/ --- @Reverent - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143845/ --- @BigDawg913 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/145872/ --- @kropo82 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/78164/ --- @tet2vd - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144513/ --- @Protagoras - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/109842/ --- @JakeO5 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/152940/ --- There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start. This is a work in progress. So, if a journal has changed or is no longer active, look around there are some amazing journals on here. --> L PS - Starting a journal also helped me a great deal. The journals are listed by age groups on the forum start page. Most members run one journal only. That way both the member and others can go back and look at their journey at a later time. Hope to read your journal soon. Also, in your personal details you can put a link to your journal. Then, appears under your avatar. -
For me NoFap is 1/2 program & 1/2 fellowship. Click on these people and post a "hello" on their profiles. I've found that the bricks that hold this community together are cemented with the support of the members of the fellowship. @I_can_and_I_will @Barry Barnstein @Ready to be healthy @Brahmacharin @tet2vd @Satchi @JackMcWaffles @BigDawg913 @zakes @LilD @kropo82 Look at with whom they exchange messages and you will find more profiles. So, if you would have found more profiles yourself, why suggest these particular ones as a start? Those relationships started with just saying hello. So, my ESH is that saying hello has kept the fellowship alive for myself. Looking forward to your success and in seeing you say hello on these profiles, --> L
The NoFap Community. There is so much on NoFap it was confusing to me at first. I've broken it down to make it easier for me to navigate in my own head. Forum Threads and Posts in Threads: Are like emails. Longer and thought out. To see new threads I do it two ways. One way is to click "Forums" in the black menu bar, then click on the forum you'd like to view. The messages are then listed by the most recent reply. At bottom of the page you'll see a small box with "Thread Display Options" You can change how the posts display if you want. The other way is to click "Forums" in the black menu bar, then click "New Posts" in the blue menu below. Journals: Threads created in the Reboot Logs section which are listed by age. They work the same way as any other thread or post. Most members start and keep one journal. Start your own journal in the appropriate age section and once you have your journal started you can list a link to it in "Personal Details" in your profile - your journal will show below your avatar on all your fourm posts. Profiles: Information about members. Not everyone shares the same amount of information. But, profiles can be helpful to get an idea about the member. To see a member's profile, click a member's name and a pop up box will show you the basics - you can see a bit more by clicking their name in the pop up box or just "X" out of the pop up. Profile Posts: More like text messages. They are used for quick congratulations, encouragement, random thoughts and status updates. To see all new Profile Posts, Click "Members" on the black menu bar, then click "New Profile Posts". Groups: There is pretty much a group for everything. Great way to get to know people with similar interests. Click "Groups" on the black menu bar. Then, join the ones that interest you. Alerts: Maybe the part it took me the longest to really grasp how to work since alerts are created when many different events happen. Click "Alerts" on the black menu bar. Then click "Show All" at the bottom of the alerts drop down box (clicking the big Alerts at the top of the box does the same thing). Now all alerts with the newest on top on a page instead of the drop down box. Here are some common Alerts: "Liked" It shows you when another member liked your profile or thread post. You can, if you want, leave a message on their profile thanking them for the like(s). Note: it's against the forum policy to ask members for likes - but you can thank them after the fact. But, mostly, a like just lets you see who liked your post and requires no action. "Replied" Shows that a member replied to a thread or a profile post. The reply may be directed to you or be a reply to the thread. Clicking the "title of the thread" will show you the reply. You can reply yourself, like the reply or both. Use the back button to return to your alerts. "Commented" Similar to replied but, on a profile post. Click "your post". You can like the comment,make another comment or both. Use the back button to return to your alerts. "Wrote a Message" A member wrote a message on your profile. Click "your profile" to open the message. Reply to it, like it or both. Use the back button to return to your alerts. "Quoted" A member quoted your text in a reply to a thread. Click the "title of the thread" to see the new reply. Use the back button to return to your alerts. "Mentioned You" A member used the "@" and your user ID in a post. This might be a post you've been following or not. It works from both profile posts and forum posts. Click the "title of the post" to read the reply.
