42 days Yesterday I got terribly stressed by life, it was very emotionally and I'm still shaken. I slept poorly and was very anxious. I even found a way to relapse and had fantasies about it but luckly I stayed strong. I sounds stupid and I'm telling you guys again and again but I need to get off of the coffee. Yesterday I had five cups and I already am anxious by nature. My girlfriend complains about me smelling because this makes me sweat badly. Maybe I should google how to overcome caffeine addiction. Stay strong guys, it's worth it
Day 19. Got up on time. Went for a walk. It's sunny! But... I am tempted. Quite much. I wonder what will I do... Spoiler: Journey stuff Hard mode + no shutting blockers down - day 19. No caffeine (no coffee, tea, chocolate, etc.). Calisthenics workout every Saturday. I can do one additional workout on any chosen day. 10 done.
Day 19. II. Minute ago I was close to relapse. Almost shut down blockers. I can't believe it. I thought I was so determined. Spoiler: Journey stuff Hard mode + no shutting blockers down - day 19. No caffeine (no coffee, tea, chocolate, etc.). Calisthenics workout every Saturday. I can do one additional workout on any chosen day. 10 done.
Day 3 Good day. I had an epiphany: If i just do the right things, and think the right things, life will work out. Very banal, but quite true. Thinking about this let to much clarity. Life became simple.
Checking in Fellowship Friends! 12 Day Free of PMO Quick check in today, very productive day. Stay Strong!
Day 31 It’s a nice feeling to have been free for a whole month. Urges have been a real problem for me over the past few days, but as I’m writing this I realise that they only surface when I’m at home, alone, and find myself bored with whatever I’m doing. Identifying these three triggers will be very helpful going ahead, and I’m looking forward to making more progress.
Have not been on here in a long time. My new therapist was asking me if I post on Nofap. A nice reminder and I am glad to be back. I will try and post here every day. 0 days. I learned some techniques from my therapist today. To help bring me out of the hyper something state. They worked. I have never felt more calm. On the drive back I did not even get mad once in rush hour traffic. Amazing. haha Went to the grocery store and bought healthy food because I did not need to comfort myself. I am doing these things every day. Soon as I get home from school and when I get back to work. Probably in the morning too. Maybe with these I can start to build a good life. Nice to be back.
Day 20. 20 days hardmodes. Quite nice. What's the most surprising for me, that I haven't had wet dream yet. On March it will be 6 years that I am trying "no pmo". I don't have much to show, but I think I deserve a medal for being stubborn. In these years my philosophy about this completely changed. I started this because I wanted benefits and to avoid the dangers of overindulgence. Now, that I realise that most benefits are just the placebo, it's more difficult. But it's doable. I am trying to do this for the right reasons now. Respecting other people, respecting God's laws, respecting myself (not making my body just pleasure gratifying machine). And, of course, I still avoid dangers of overindulgence. You'll say that I am a lunatic, but I am more and more fine with serving God and His plan. Even though sometimes it's very difficult and I fail, I see beauty in being obedient. I am fine with that. Spoiler: Journey stuff Hard mode + no shutting blockers down - day 20. No caffeine (no coffee, tea, chocolate, etc.). Calisthenics workout every Saturday. I can do one additional workout on any chosen day. 10 done.
I'll be honest. Your posts make me sad past few months. You used to be very serious about this and now I see my friend regressing. Maybe I am wrong, but it seems that healing from addiction is like last priority in you life now. Usually addicts become free, when they make this number one or two priority in their life. Everything else is just delaying a relapse. These sentences apply to me too... Usually I just slide by luck in this with just few epiphanies from time to time that I still want to be on the right road.