Never too late

Hi there! I'm new in this forum, hoping to find help and support on my journey.
I'm almost 40 years old and single. It just has not happened yet with Mr. Right.

I found out about masturbation when I was about 14, reading in a magazine for adolescents with a "Love and Sex" section where kids can ask questions about these tings.

There are times when I am NoFap for a long time, sometimes months. But there are times where I watch porn twice a day and masturbate just to relax. It is so easy...

But deep inside I know how wrong this is, how much I am betraying myself. I want to find another way to deal with my stress and feel whole finally, and happy and free. I feel so gross and I feel as if I was the only female in the world who is struggling with this. In "my world" it is a problem males have, women don't talk about this...

I'm ashamed and so glad I found this site to come clean at least in this way. Even to people whom I trust, I cannot talk about this.

So thank you all for being here and for receiving me in your community. I want to be a part of this journey to freedom and happiness.

Agatha

 

Thank you so, so much! I already feel better about being here.
I know a difference between emotional M and O, and what I call for myself "cold" M and O. Only the first one brings pleasure - a guilty one, the second just release. Both are disgusting to me afterwards.

 

You are very kind. And wise. Thank you! I'm looking into the site a little. Looking for other ladies. That would make me feel more comfortable talking. Is there a special section for women?

 

Thank you! It seems difficult to find other females in the community. Is there a possibility to browse the members by gender? Reading some male comments seems rather triggering for me...

 

I will. Thank you and God bless!

 

So glad for your beginner's tipps! I have been clean for a certain time, but I feel the growing danger these days. I don't want to seek help here and then fall because of triggers :-(