Male emotions

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by ClaudeDuval, Sep 2, 2018.

  1. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Disclaimer: I am not saying my opinions and ideas are true for every single persons case, this is based on myself and other men I have interacted with in my life.

    There is this idea that men are sort of cold creatures who have no emotions. This is untrue, men are only selective when it comes to their emotional outlets which often times is mistaken for a man being "cold" or "standoffish". Women often times have multiple emotional outlets, friends, a mother, sister, etc. Men often times will have one emotional outlet, a girlfriend or wife. When this emotional outlet is removed, a man can become extremely impaired(which might explain the suicide rates among divorced men). Throughout history we have heard songs, viewed art, read literature, by hurt men who lost their one and only emotional outlet. With that being said, it is my belief that men have the capacity to be the more passionate romantic lovers coupled with more extreme devotion...

    In my own relationship I always felt as though I was the more "emotional" one and had more passion as well as always wanting more out of the relationship... Things were the complete opposite compared to the things we see on TV and the stereotypes of men. What do you guys think? And as a man, have you ever felt that you were the more passionate lover in your relationship?
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2018

  2. I think lack of an/multiple emotional outlets works both ways. It forces you to adapt and become stronger and more self reliant, or it causes you to self destruct.

    If you can't cry your way to victory, then you are forced to find another solution, ya know?
    ClaudeDuval likes this.
  3. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Def like that reply, Thank you!
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Max Fisher

    Max Fisher Fapstronaut

    This is very interesting. I can agree. I would add though that the brotherhood of men means that sometimes the best friend is actually more of the emotional outlet. It's true about men being very emotional though. I read this article about 5 year olds who were put in rooms with a crying infant. All the boys showed higher levels of anxiety and emotion on average then the girls. I wish I could find it again. If I do I'll link it.
  5. Yes this is untrue. The old maxim that, men think / women feel, is outmoded. In the context of relationships, I don't know.
    ClaudeDuval likes this.
  6. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Please do, I'd love to read that.
  7. ArsenalAffliction

    ArsenalAffliction Fapstronaut

  8. Max Fisher

    Max Fisher Fapstronaut

    I spent so much time today trying to find where I may have read that and came to two possible conclusions.

    1. It exists somewhere and I will never ever find it again.

    2. I'm misremembering and it is some incepted thought that isn't true.

    Anyways, I tried...
    Saskia Simone likes this.
  9. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Thank you for the comment :)
  10. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Aww boo, interesting though.
    Max Fisher likes this.
  11. HereAndThere

    HereAndThere Fapstronaut

    Its interesting how you noticed that women are mans only "allowed" emotional outlet. But at the same time, when i was completely emotionally open with women in my life relationship always suffered. They usually became anxious for being put in a position where they had to deal with my negative emotions and then they would often try to exit the situation in some way if they had a way and just freak out if they didnt. Maybe women have more empathy but they are less equipped to deal with emotions than men who are taught to deal with them alone? Not really an ideal emotional outlet for men is it... Unless you carefully feed them tiny little chunks of tastiest parts of your emotional life. That puts a complicated filter on mans emotional expression, making the average man(or whatever that resulting creature is) seem like its missing some emotions.

    Men can sometimes show extraordinary sympathy for other men. At least while that filter allows them to. I feel sad for them and myself when i see that wall they pull up soon after they show a glimpse of their real self.
    Max Fisher likes this.
  12. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Great input/insight, HereAndThere! I wouldn't say their only allowed emotional outlet but from what I can see, this is just how things play out sometimes(not saying it's right or wrong). I can totally see where you're coming from... Some women are horrible at problem solving or dealing with situations that are troublesome(could be due to natural selfishness and self serving attitudes). I've been totally open and emotional in my own relationship and I've had to learn to deal with things on my own because my GF simply wanted to eject out of the whole situation... Women often times want men to be more "open" and "emotional" but often times you do and they want nothing to do with any of it. They want all the "sweet" emotions but they want to leave all the rest like a self serving buffet line. I've tried to be "close" to other men and they get uncomfortable and weird about it. They seem to hate talking about personal things and want to direct the conversation towards hobbies and material items. Either I need new friends or were just suppose to go at life alone and be able to cope alone... idk. lmao
    HereAndThere likes this.
  13. HereAndThere

    HereAndThere Fapstronaut

    My friend would say to me that i am thinking to much in those moments. Lol, he is using the word "think" instead of "feel". Men arent supposed to feel, we dont even have vocabulary for that.
    I hope not. Im tired of coping alone. Lol, i guess im thinking to much.
  14. AngelofDarkness

    AngelofDarkness Fapstronaut

    Why would women be selfish by nature? I would argue that women are actually more altruistic than men.
  15. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Yep, I get the same responses. lol Most men aren't interested in discussing these issues because maybe they're already caught up in dealing with their own bottled up issues... I'm also tired of coping alone, even being in a relationship I feel alone half the time. lmao Maybe the best solution is to find a group of dedicated men to rely on(idk).
  16. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    I'd say men are MORE emotional than women, they just hide it more.
    Max Fisher and Contentful T like this.
  17. Contentful T

    Contentful T Fapstronaut

    I'd say cultural stereotypes create a fake divide between men and women and what should be called human emotions.
    Deleted Account likes this.
  18. ClaudeDuval

    ClaudeDuval Fapstronaut

    Because it's always men committing selfless acts like Arnaud Beltrame... Men are always sacrificing themselves to save people in times of desperation. They sacrifice themselves for their country, their families, etc. all the time and do so with no complaints. And in relationships it's men always going out of their way to make their GFs/Wives feel special and cute. Sending flowers, being romantic, surprises, trying to go above and beyond... Women hardly put in effort in the reverse. Even things they do "for the man" end up being an indirect favor or treat for themselves. Mothers day men try their best yet fathers day is half assed imo lmao Women want men to "be more emotional" but they want to walk through a man's life like a buffet line and pick out the cute happy emotions and leave everything else. Yet were told men are the cold ones who have no emotions lol Men need a brotherhood of other men to find real companions and friendship but we look for this in GFs and wives...
    HereAndThere and The Unfadeable like this.
  19. TheManDude

    TheManDude Fapstronaut

    I agree, I began to notice this even more when I first started NoFap... I think I used PMO to escape reality so much that end up hurting how I deal with emotional stress. Lately that's something I've been putting so much work into and yeah I have only a couple of emotional outlets but i'm trying to be a lot more open with my feelings, which I think could work to not be dependant on a specific person.
  20. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

    In terms of scientific facts about which gender has the most potential for feeling their emotions, I don't know.

    In terms of having the emotional intelligence of being aware, knowing how to handle them, or being able to express them in a positive way... it really depends on the individual.

    I mean... what does being "more" emotional really mean? A person that enjoys being a victim, complaining all day, and dwelling on the negative could be considered "more" emotional than others. A person that loses their shit every time something doesn't go their way could be considered "more" emotional.

    So having the intelligence to be aware, handle, and express them in a healthy way is more important in my opinion. Not the person that can complain or lose control the most.
    Jason_Tesla_19 likes this.

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