I am depressed. I am angry. I am sad. I will not forgive them.

Me: Mother am hungry..can you give me something to eat?
Mother: No

Me: NANI?! (☉_☉)

 

Agree with you
@Kuroi Yume
I know that you're hurt, but I bet that inside you dont really want to spend your precious life alone. It's not worth it, no matter how and who hurt you.
An Harvard study that went for 75 years, tracked the lives of 724 men, year after year, asking about their work, their home lives, their health in order to find what are the ingredients of happiness.
The answer was only one ingredient: a good relationships with other people.
I want to send some good resources and if you want you can feedback about them here/pm
Loneliness
How to fix a broken heart
Harvard study

 

Hey man what you're worried about? Your honesty? Loyalty?Your chivalry? You being conscientious? It's not your fault. You have to unmask many people with different state of mind/disorders to get to know them thoroughly, it's a fact nowadays.The real underlying reasons for this is the change of structures in societies. It will take time to adapt to it.
It's become a dirty,challenging world, because we're living with our obsolete moralities.
You have 2 ways: 1.Coordinate/be on the same wavelength with the changes in the societies. 2.Whine/cringe.

 

"Nice guy" is shit.
It's planned to only let "the dominant" live. It's part of eugenics notion.
Gentle,benign,compassionate,religious,kind,sensitive and other good personality traits have LOWER chance of production.
You should change according to the nature changes.
Sensitivity to the changes(and changing according to it) is the highest form of intelligence.

 

• "altruism may be attractive to women"
• Nice guys are usually seen as twice more attractive than men who prefer to present themselves as neutral, and eight times more attractive than the "jerks"
• Sprecher and Regan (2002) found kindness and warmth, expressiveness, openness and humor, as desirable traits of a long-term partner

these are all quotes from the wikipedia link. there are mixed study's results in there...
although I agree that confidence and domination are atrractive traits in a male, it is not true for all girls out there

 

Very well, you can choose to be a nice guy then and see what happens

 

I'm not going to judge, but have a look at this:

Granting forgiveness was associated with activations in a brain network involved in theory of mind, empathy, and the regulation of affect through cognition, which comprised the precuneus, right inferior parietal regions, and the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex


HOLY SHIT! got it? By bearing grudge, you simply F. yourself up! I just don't give any shit to people I didn't like. If they were bad to me, then I'd simply throw them out and concentrate on more important activities.
By forgiveness, I mean trying to convince yourself that it was just happened. Was your fault? Was it their fault? Was it because of some trash rules? (the rules of relationships, and or personal interaction etc)
You,if should blame anyone/anything, then should blame the governors/blame our educational system that hasn't implemented any worthy resource/educational plan to initiate useful interaction between individuals.

It's not a human's failure that seems ugly by us, it's our failure to provide individuals with appropriate opportunity to love and to live in harmony.


And about you, try to settle the grudge and your personal prejudice. I know you're hurt but it's not worth the outcome.


LOL, let me tell you a story. Once, I gone wild with a few women(terrible personalities) and I said indirectly on a website that "The more you try to invalidate me, the more you're helping me to disable that part of my brain related to love and compassion" !

I was dead serious. I tried to get myself out of everything related to love, relationshits*,intimacy and beyond in hopes of my wound get alleviated.

BUT, the more I hit it off with different women, the more I realize it's nary our failure, it's about some stupid rules written by some philosophers,governors etc.
I spent almost 3000 hours of my life to know what's wrong with me or with the people and then I got it to the core of problem and perceived it's about rules man, some foolish rules that social medias spread everywhere, and the education system itself is the case.

Bear this in you mind forever, every time you come across a problem:
Know more about your problem before making any decisions. Look at it from different perspectives.

 

This is very serious thing you said. Yes I have grudges, when my mother had operation, I went to stay at my uncle's, I was there for 6/7 days and I had to return home because my aunt didn't gave me food to eat. She did not fed me, I was 20 back then, my mom was ill my mental condition wasn't good so I did not cared about food back then.
Long ago my uncle said I watch porn (at that time I didn't even know what's porn) in front of everybody at my grandpa's funeral. And they mocked me and insulted me. How can I forget that tell me, there are many more reasons why I can't forgive them. I can't even forgive my dead father who left us in deep shit. My father's brother insulted my mother, he kicked us out of our dad's house when I was 2 years old in a city which mother didn't know very well. I can't forgive them, I just can't. If I see them again I don't know what I will do..

 

Whatever behind the mask, I will burn it if required.

 

Bro, you already have the answer to your problem in fact. ^^ The strongest men out there don't need anybody. They don't need friends. They don't need a girlfriend. The only thing they need to move forward in their lives is themselves, and that's it. They might want friends, and they might want a girlfriend as well, but they don't need to in fact. That's why they don't feel offended when they get rejected. It's not big deal after all.

Be happy with yourself man. Learn to love yourself in the first place, and if you have the chance to have a loving family, be grateful for that. I'm not telling you to stay alone. Not at all. What I'm telling is to stop seeking for friends, and try to be a friend instead.

Stay strong man. I care about you if you want to know.

 

everybody is good person, ask one question to yourself- are you caring for a person? are you willing to lend a helping hand and understand problems of others. if yes then you are just in a bad company and need to change your circle.

 

I feel you man. it's interesting many members have similarities in this thread. I used to ignore such situations and feelings, until I reached an end point and decided to face it. Every person is good, or lets say a good person to me is a bad person to another. This is why we have to feel ok with being rejected and focus on ourselves above anything else. Everyone should love himself and appreciate it before anything, and then treat others as he would like to be treated; respect, love, compassion and diplomacy. And when it looks clearly someone just cares about you when he only needs something then that person shall be dismissed.

 

You claim to know the book but you see the cover and melt.

 

Thanks Deku Thank you so much.

 

Thank you Andrew, thanks for the support, yes I am staying clear from people for many months now, first I want to know myself; find myself. Let's see what is up ahead.

 

can you explain sir?