Psalm 147:3 ESV He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Read this regularly when lonely. Psalm 27:10 ESV For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in. Read this often during at holidays. Spending time in the Word and in prayer has special meaning during these times. God knows about your exact situation and He cares. Second, negative self talk continues the mad cycle. Instead of thinking or saying negative things, quote a verse. Isaiah 41:10 ESV Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” When we focus on Godly things, He will strengthen us. Your future will be brighter after He strengthens you. Psalm 25:16 ESV Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.” David repented, then prayed this prayer. Then the Bible says that the Lord's Spirit returned to him. Third, find a few new hobbies. Stick with them for at least a few weeks. They will not be life-changing until you stick with them long enough to see if they will really help you. Matthew 6:33 ESV But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” We start to get what we want in life when we follow this verse. This verse helped me overcome a lot of my issues. Study, meditate, and memorize these verses. They will help you through.
1 Peter 4:8 ESV “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” Great advice. Studying love is a key to fighting loneliness. I meditate on the following scripture and pray about each aspect of love. When we consistently do that our lives start to change and loneliness starts to fade away. To double the speed of the process, focus on living life God's way. He will always be the key to starting a great life. This process really helped change my life in a huge way. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ESV Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. 1 Corinthians 16:14 ESV “Let all that you do be done in love.” What if we all memorized this? 1 John 4:19 ESV We love because he first loved us.” I pray often, "Lord, take away my lust and give me a Spirit of courage." I pray this in total sincerity often. It has really helped. A good motto: Run from lust. Increase in love.
Joshua 1:9 ESV Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Make it a goal to live the way God wants you to live. It will cause this verse to come true for you. Matthew 6:22 The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. 23 But if thine eye be evil, thy whole body shall be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness!” This verse shows that we underestimate how great it would be to quit. How great it would be to live in the shining light. If we fully live right, our joy is increasing, and we start to gain the power to fight loneliness effectively. Our peace becomes complete, we find courage and direction. Make a habit of turning from smut, and your life will start to light up.
I was trying to make changes to improve my life. I was praying about courage so I could make those changes. But, my results were mixed. I should have paid more attention to something I noticed while browsing the Christian, Catholic, and Protestant groups. All of them had articles saying that the way we solve our problems is by studying what the Bible says about them. For lust they said, go to Google and, "Look up, and study verses on lust." This week I am going to study and meditate on Bible verses about doing what I need to do to change. Here are some of them: 2 Timothy 1:7 ESV For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. Proverbs 28:1 ESV The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion. Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Psalm 31:24 ESV Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord! I am not always good at doing what these verses say, but I know that things always get better when I try. So, I will write most of these out so that I can read them daily, and meditate on them. That way my prayers will be more focused on things that take my darkness out, and let the Light in.
To fight anxiety and depression we need to live “In today.” Living in today helps us be happier and more outgoing which helps us overcome loneliness. A lot of bad things happened to all of us in the past. Some people keep rehashing the past, others make a habit of “only” thinking about today. Write down 5-10 things you can allow yourself to think about today. Carry your list around with you until you make “Living in today” a habit. Next, we can't spend time worrying about tomorrow. We all have things that may get messed up this week or this month. Some people keep rehashing all kinds of negative possible outcomes. Instead, focus on this verse: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” Try this prayer, “Lord, help me not to worry.” Psalm 3:3 ESV But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.” The more we do things God's way, the more this verse comes true. Now look at your list of 5-10 things you can allow yourself to think about today. Focus only on those things. Don't allow yourself to think about tomorrow. Reread the list until you make “Living in today” a habit. You can find other articles like this in the Christian section.
I heard and read about it. I used to very anxious person and looke for answers. I'm a bit less anxious nowadays. Anxiety is about the future. We don't worry about the past. It already happened. But we draw conclusions from our past experiences and worry about the future. However, you cannot just think about the present. (I'd love to be able to do it.) The brain works on its own. It is afraid. The only way to fight anxiety, in my opinion of course (it may not apply to you, everyone is different), is to build your self-esteem based on your previous experiences. You may think "I've dealt with similar situations in the past, so I will manage again". In the past when I was anxious I used to repeat to myself: "You can do it. You can do it". (It had a temporary calming effect). But now I say to myself: "You can do it because you always could and you always will. In fact, you're doing it now." Also having some support from friends or forum users or family is definitely useful. Have a good day, @2ctruth
To combat loneliness look for articles on NoFap about new ways to think. About new activities, positive addictions, prayer, emotions, “The Light,” and joy. There are many Christian articles like those on this site. Simply put in the NoFap search something like “Positive Addictions.” Some of these types of articles are filled with tips for overcoming depression. So the key to overcoming it is to have organized, available, and at your fingertips... some of those ideas that you are working on. Second, the # 1 key to getting on top of problems is by what we do. Many read articles, but only a few study and do what they say daily. Today, review old articles and find two habits that you want to make into permanent lifestyle choices. Things like running from lust, or studying Bible verses when you are tempted. One of my new habits is to try to read this verse every day: Proverbs 28:1 ESV The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion.” I want the habit of being bold, it would make my life better. Our new habits start to bring self-control over lust. New habits of doing things God's way will start to put our lives in the light. That's where we want to be.
Bad events happen which gives us an excuse to go back to porn. Things like: Life is too tough to handle. 2. Why did God let this happen? 3. My life always goes bad. 4. God is not being fair. 5. The world is against me. Is it wise to think about any of these things? No. A Bible verse tells us what we should be thinking about: Things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. If we think wrong we will often do wrong. Instead, copy and paste new things to think about based on NoFap articles, Bible articles, sermons, etc. Have a file of thoughts you should be thinking about. When you start thinking wrong, always grab that file. At some point, you will start to make it a habit to think right. If you think right, you will do right. The Christian section has more articles about how to change your thinking so that you will have new ways to think. When we think right we will have a friend in Jesus right here with us. John 14:18 ESV “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.” Thinking right leads to quality time with Jesus. Quality time with Jesus starts to kill loneliness.
When we focus on doing things Jesus' way, then we start to have hope. Psalm 34:17-20 ESV When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.” God has help and deliverance for the righteous. Study this verse to inspire yourself to live life God's way. Romans 15:13 ESV May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. The Holy Spirit gives us hope. Study being filled with the Holy Spirit on Google to increase in hope. The Holy Spirit will help you fight loneliness. Jeremiah 29:11 ESV For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Refuse to give up. Keep your faith. The Bible always is eventually 100% true for those who keep fighting. Today, consider saying every hour: “I will keep fighting.” Isaiah 40:31 ESV But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. A block of prayer gives strength. Repent, pray, then believe this verse. These verses force us to turn our eyes to Jesus. Dig into what He offers and renew your hope. Lastly, commit to God Psalm 37:5 ESV Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.” We want God to act. Study this verse daily if you want Him to act. Galatians 6:9 ESV And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” Commit to doing good if you want to reap freedom. Proverbs 18:1 ESV Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment. Consider having a commitment to a time to work on quitting daily. Consider having a commitment to a time for Bible study and prayer daily. Hope - Commit - succeed.
Today I am focusing on 1 Timothy 6 which reads, “6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.” Update: I have been studying daily: Proverbs 28:1 ESV The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion.” It has been working for me. Since I started studying this I am quite a bit bolder. Based on that success I have good confidence that the study of this new verse will help. That is good... because loneliness is high this week and life sort of stinks. To find contentment, read this verse daily and pray things like: “Lord, take away my lust, and help me to be content.” “Lord, help me to be Godly, and help me to be content.” This is a strategy that is helpful during a tough week, or anytime. God bless.
https://www.psychologytools.com/ wrote the following: “When we are depressed we become less active. The less active we are the fewer opportunities there are for positive and rewarding things to happen to us. And the fewer rewarding things that happen to us the lower our mood becomes. Behavioral Activation (BA) is one way out of this vicious cycle. It is a practical and evidence-based treatment for depression. A more proactive way of breaking the vicious cycle of depression is to increase our level of activity even if we don’t feel like it to begin with.” It is very hard to quit porn when depressed. Slowly, but consistently increasing our activity level is healthy and it starts to lead us back to happiness. To do this, write down (chart) what you do in your free hours with something like a Google calendar. At week's end review how each activity made you feel. Then slowly change one or two of your passive activities to active ones. A dramatic example of this would be. You watch TV on Tuesday nights. Now you start a disco dance class (okay I am old). If your energy level is low, try just changing 1 hour of what you do that night. Over time you can slowly change from passive, and negative activities to action, and positive activities. But don't add 5 physical things at once. Mix in a restful positive passive activity like reading a positive book like the Energy bus. Consider charting time each day for Bible study and prayer. Charting shows us which days and hours overload us with temptation. Our notes from that research show us which activities make us feel bad. Once we have that knowledge we can start to change those activities, and sharply lower the temptation that bombards us.
This week I will be watching the Australian Open tennis tournament. The temptation is about average for watching something like this (beautiful female tennis players). I will focus on two things to stay “free” of lust this week. I will practice turning from lust consistently and often. The more we think about turning, the more we will practice it. Before I turn on the TV I will pray: “Father, help me to turn from lust.” Then I will pray it often throughout any program that has any risk. Second, I will focus on studying the fruits of the Spirit on the days that I watch. Today I am printing out the fruits of the spirit. Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” This month I will be praying over each of the fruits of the Spirit. Reading each fruit then praying: “Father, fill me with Your love.” “Father, fill me with Your joy.” “Father, fill me with Your self-control, etc.” Praying over the fruits of the Spirit is wise because it allows the Spirit to fill you and help you. There are always two parts to quitting. What you stop doing, and what you start doing. Plus, if what you start doing involves scripture... that is a real home run. You can learn more about the habit of turning from lust in the Christian section.
For many people, loneliness overwhelms them, then life runs them over leaving them in despair. But... it is a perfect excuse to fall. If we don't run to Christ in times like these, despair will lead to depression, which usually leads to a fall. When life runs us over we can obey the Bible and 16 “Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” But until we make that a habit we need to learn to deal with despair. Step #1 is to do a Google search of verses about despair: Psalm 34:17-20 ESV When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” When in despair, read this often. 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 ESV We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; When in despair, read this often. 1 Peter 5:7 ESV Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” Try praying: “Father, show me what to think about today.” 1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” If we always keep our eyes and thoughts on scripture during despair and temptation, then, this verse is always true. Romans 15:13 ESV May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” When in despair, read this often. Psalm 91:1-16 ESV He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Jeremiah 29:11 ESV For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Try praying: “Father, I believe that You will give me a future and a hope.” Psalm 23:1-6 ESV A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. … When in despair, pray over this often. Psalm 55:22 ESV / Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved. When in despair, read this every hour. Psalm 43:5 ESV Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God. Consider praying: “Father, help me today. Teach me how to handle this situation. Show me how to learn so that I can someday help others.” The power of the Holy Spirit fills us as we study these verses. When we pray and are filled with that power, then Psalm 23 becomes real to us.
Write down and memorize 5 reasons you want to quit. When tempted, review these reasons often. Reasons It leads to depression Isolation/loneliness will increase It will hurt the goals of better relationships It hurts our relationship with God Emotions like anger and anxiety will increase Today, write out a great list. The more often you review it, the stronger you will be.
To quit an addiction we decide to do new activities and then we do them. They are not for fun, play, pleasure, or profit. It is wise to treat them like work or some great difficult goal. Example: I decide my new activity is playing the piano. First I set a goal: 30 minutes per day. # 2 Decide exactly when you will do it: 6:30 PM. # 3 Say 10 times daily why you need to do this activity: “I need to play the piano so that I stop being a slave to ______.” # 4 Pray, “Lord take away this lust, and fill me with Your love.” Spiritual goals should be a priority. But after that, your activity goals should sometimes be the next most important. But what about family? It is a balance, a juggling game that you need to play until you get healthy. One solution to the family question is to work out with them. Do a hobby with them. New activities are not great fun if you are really addicted. Addiction uses up all our fun and leaves us dark and empty. So keep this in mind. The exact same activities that you don't love in week one of quitting seem a lot better in week 4 after you have been clean for a month and are in a good place with God. Someday, some of your new activities will become positive addictions. I lift weights every day. I play either the piano or bass guitar virtually every day. I write articles about addiction every day and I do many other things every day. Secondly, I want to try to explain how life gets better after we quit. With addiction, we move from fun event (hopefully) to fun event. Trying to find answers, fun, thrills. With freedom plus Jesus, we start to find increasing joy, and answers. With addiction, we watch TV always searching frantically for thrills. With freedom plus Jesus, we start to enjoy clean TV and we start to find contentment. With addiction, there are no answers. With freedom plus Jesus, we start to find a purpose for living. With addiction, we are driven, driven, driven. A constant flurry of trying to find... I don't know what. With freedom plus Jesus, we can ask Jesus what He wants us to do. Then we are filled with His peace and we can do His will. With addiction, we sometimes struggle with family and people. With freedom plus Jesus, we learn how important it is to live in love. Activities are key. They will change your life if you make it a priority to do them daily. Activities get you out there to meet new people and they give you the energy to fight loneliness.
My wife sometimes has massive problems at her business and half of the time I don't even know she has problems. Why? Because she is an expert at putting problems behind her! She has mastered meekness. Meekness is defined by Webster as enduring injury with patience and without resentment. But the Bible adds to that by showing how it is strength under control. Consider praying: “Lord, teach me how to have strength under control.” Sometimes I sit around talking to my wife for two hours in the evening and she still never mentions any trouble. She can do this because she has made it a habit to “Endure injury with patience and without resentment.” Meekness is a top ten trait to learn in order to overcome addiction. If bad events cause you to fall it may be a top-five trait. Matthew 5:5 ESV “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.” See how great the Bible is. If you put in the work to be meek to quit a habit... you get a bonus. Psalm 37:11 ESV But the meek shall inherit the land and delight themselves in abundant peace.” Bonus number two. Work on meekness and also increase in peace. Psalm 25:9 ESV He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble his way.” This refers to a 2nd definition of meekness from Merrian Webster: “The quality or state of being meek : a mild, moderate, humble, or submissive quality.” When we focus on these things, God leads us and teaches us. Matthew 11:29 ESV Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” This statement by Jesus shows how He leads by example. Try praying every hour for the next three days: “Lord, help me to endure injury with patience and without resentment.” Today, I am adding this statement to the things I meditate on daily. Hopefully, someday I will make it a habit. If disaster has always caused your falls, consider making this prayer a permanent habit.
When David stared with lust at Bathsheba he forgot to ask this question. Are these thoughts scriptural? I am guessing he learned that “habit” after all the destruction. He didn't ask: Will these thoughts build me up, or tear me down? He didn't ask: Where did these thoughts originate? In his later years, we know that David learned to get busy doing what God wanted him to do again. He got his mind busy, thinking the way God wanted him to think again. Today, the focus is learning to praise the Lord the way David did. He was one of the greatest Christians of all time when he focused on thinking right and praising God. David wrote Psalms. Let's see what he said. Psalm 150:6 ESV Let everything that has breath praise the Lord! Praise the Lord!” Today I learned... this sounds as much like a command, as it does a suggestion. Psalm 34:1 ESV I will bless the Lord at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth. Psalm 71:8 ESV My mouth is filled with your praise, and with your glory all the day.” David focused on God's glory all day, and he praised God all day. Psalm 100:1-5 ESV A Psalm for giving thanks. Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth! Serve the Lord with gladness! Come into his presence with singing! Know that the Lord, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations. Hebrews 13:15 ESV Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name. Psalm 146:1-2 ESV Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord, O my soul! I will praise the Lord as long as I live; I will sing praises to my God while I have my being.” Always work on improving the habit of praising God. Praising the Lord fights loneliness, and it is a great tool for renewing your mind to get your thinking off of the wrong things.
I read an article about steps to improving life. It read: “First, get your joy from God, not from your spouse, your career, your money, or your hobbies. Psalm 16:11 “Thou wilt show me the path of life: in thy presence is the fullness of joy: and at thy right hand there are pleasures forevermore.” Today, try to include God in your relationships, activities, and even time spent in front of the TV.” My life always has more joy when I include God in it. It continues: “Step two: Be content. What do you need to pray (daily) about to be content with? Jobs, wives, relationships, lack of relationships, lack of money? Many of us will have a lot of problems every day. Consider memorizing 1 Timothy 6:6 “But godliness with contentment is great gain.” God wants to help you through your problems by helping you be content. Keep praying about it until it happens (because we have all fallen a thousand times when we were discontented).” I have tried praying to be content and it has helped me. It is hard to be lonely when we are fully content. It continues: “Step three: Let God's love fill you. I have a printout of verses about love which I meditate on almost every day. I also pray over 1st Corinthians 13:4-6 as well. Why? Because, the Bible says: 1st John 4:16 And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.” If God starts to be more “in us” as we study love, does that help us live in His presence?” Three things to work on and pray about. Good stuff. These are just the highlights of the full article called Create your own garden of eden, written Friday 2-10-2023 in the Christian section.
