HELP ... I am going to FAP

I have a really strong urge. I guess I am gonna do the following.

1. Go to my room and turn on my computer or phone

2. Start browsing the sites I know. I know many good sites. I will keep watching those whores and losers fucking each other. very exciting.

3. It is been few minutes already.. my back is arched. My mouth is wide open, my eyes are not blinking and I started to feel a dry mouth. But the pleasure resulting from my left hand rubbing my Penis is bigger than any pain or dreams I have ever had.

4. After an hour or two. My body started to get tired. The pain now has started to overcome the pleasure. My balls hurt. My hands and my back hurt also because of the uncomfortable position i have been sitting glowed to the screen. Well, I guess I should ejaculate now. so I pick my best scene since I started this virtual and pathetic journey. Here I cum. Woooh . Great feeling.

5. Now, reality hits me very hard. My body feels warm. i feel weak and my mouth is even more dry.

6. I am hungry. I go to the fridge and start eating whatever my eyes lay on. I overeat

7. I go back to my spot and say to my self . I have done it already. Let’s do it one more time and then start a new streak tomorrow. This time is the last time for sure.

8. I go to bed at 1am. I am very tired, my pants are wet. I smell like cum. I am so tired to even change my clothes. I am ashamed to look at the faces of my sleeping wife and kids. They deserve a better man. I have a lot of negative emotions. I spend few minutes thinking how worthless I am until I finally go to sleep.

9. I wake up late next day hating every part of me and hating everything around me. My job, my life, the way I look, the way I handle things. I don’t even have the power to start a new streak.

10. It is just another shitty day.

Ummm. Does this sound like a good choice? Nope

Then, I won’t FAP I guess