Heirs' June "Stop the Autopilot" Challenge thread

Day 12
Part 1
I took my little brother to the park today. Time just flew by

Part 2
Had a soccer game today, and I'm sure it's my last. I was just out of it and had a terrible game. I think it's time for me expand my horizons, and fund new interests. I'm sort of excited, I used to feel pinned by the pressures I put on myself

 

Day 12

Part 1

I drove a different route home today as an intentional effort to not drive out of habit. I read a book instead of just playing video games and watching TV. Also, I texted a girl her friend had been bugging me about texting.

Part 2

Went longboarding and just reflected on what I want in life and the great things that have already happened.

 

So after yesterday I went the whole day without food or soda (2 big vices of mine) as an excersize in will power and self controle it was a good day and got to spend some time with my dad which always gives me lots to think about

 

Day 12

Part 1- Resisted my urges to bunk classes

Part 2- I realized today I fit in the definition of "Mr.Nice Guy"...I'm reading "No more Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover and a lot of things makes sense

 

Guys I failed the challenge due to extenuating life circumstances.

I am still taking massive actions daily for my recovery, don't let this discourage anyone although it may already have by my recent relapse. I have to drastically reduce my screen time and coming to this forum daily is not on the agenda.

Will post on the group wall weekly.

 

Nice signature man!!!

 

Day 12

Part 1

Tried something new and went to the park with my girlfriend before work. I usually like to go on my days off but it was a nice change and I enjoyed having her with me. It was just a nice day too so it worked out very well!

Part 2

Tonight I'm going to get some studying done for a hour then I'm going to bed.

 

Day 13
Part 1
I mostly stayed in the house, but I had a really good day, that in itself is pretty good. I also played some more with my little bro, he's a definite handful

Part 2
Today I thought about 2 things: Contradiction, and how deep we dive.
Contradictions, I contradict myself a lot, I'm order to not be a hypocrite, I either have to make a disclaimer that I'm not perfect, or that I've been screwing up in an area where I'm giving advice. Like discipline, I'm not perfect, and it still a work in progress, but it's a problem when I have to tell someone "you gotta be disciplined as much as you can", when I just ate a pbnj when I'm not hungry.

But I guess we can only keep trying to embody the advise we give, especially me. Not that I'm not disciplined, just love pbnjs too much.

How deep do we go? Just today actually, I was helping a guy in a chat. We talked and found a nice resolution, but when it started, he wantes to hide his laptop, and install blockers, and try to stay out of his room. Those are problems, yes, but we gotta dive deeper. We have to find the root within our mind which stems such feelings. You PMO, because you're alone, And you're alone because you're lonely, and you're lonely because of your mindset. I just think that we have to take it to a deeper emotional and psychological level, to get a better grasp of the situation, and when we do that, then we can restore power to ourselves. The power to make the conscious choice.

 

Day 13

Part 1

I texted a new person today. Her friend has been trying to set us up, or at least get me to text her. I started texting her about the Flash tv show and we continued on from there. It was cool just being able to talk about comic book things.

Part 2

As I was reflecting, I realized why I struggle to get one of my tasks done. I have a bunch of stuff in my parents garage and I need to organize it. However, when I go out in the day to do so, it is way to hot and I get distracted. Today I did a little bit of organizing and it was okay. So maybe I just need to do it when it is less hot and a little at a time.

 

Had to spend the whole day doing paper work and sitting through more meetings where we are spoon fed BS just can't think cant function I'm going to bed.

 

Day 13

Part 1- Did my errands despite laziness..As a master procrastinator, I did something that needed much willpower

Part 2- I feel insecure..my mind is kinda turbulent, some problems in the household, Anyways, I feel I'm healing

Stay strong comrades! Take care!

 

Day 14

Part 1

I got to go shooting with some family friends today, which was awesome. Found out the gun I got for free works!!! As far as going off auto pilot, I tried to be super careful when helping my sister write a speech. She always thinks I am too critical, and I tried to praise her as well as critique her.

Part 2

Today I reflected while throwing a frisbee around with the kids I work with. I had a lot on my mind. I dreamt that my ex and I were still together last night. It was disorienting because when I woke up, I thought we were still together and was happy and ready to text her. I soon remembered, but I wanted to go back to the dream and back to dating her. It brought back some feelings I thought I had moved past. But after reflecting, I realized that I need more time and that there will be other girls.

 

Day 14

Part 1- For the past 3 days I've been going to the park early in the morning instead of late in the day. I find that it helps me set the tone for my day and gives me a added boost of energy.


Part 2- Last night I spent a hour deleting all the p0rn saved on a few hard drives I had. I won't lie.. I felt sick doing it at first but then after thinking about it my mind changed. It felt awesome to do! I no longer have that weight on my shoulders during my streak to 90 days. I feel free.

 

Day 14
Part 1
Yesterday I had one down my brother by skateboard. Also, did some work concerning the move this summer.

Part 2
I actually forgot to think yesterday.
I was just enjoying the day as went on

 

Day 15

Part 1

I had to wake up early for work today and did so better than usual.

Part 2

I have some things I need to do and plan to do, but when I get time I make excuses to not do them. I want this to change.

 

Day 15
Part 1
Went to a graduation ceremony for my dad

Part 2
Yesterday, I thought about how I could help my fellow heirs in the sanctuary. I'm trying to give good advice, but I also have take my own advice to not be a hypocrite

 

Day 15

Spent most of the day just relaxing. I had to work late so I sort of just chilled until it was time to get ready. Did some reading and watched some Netflix. When I woke up this morning I had the craziest dream and it was sexual in nature. I traced everything back to fantasizing before bed which I'm going to make a conscious effort to stop tonight.

Part 2

Today I spent time practicing being in the moment. Tried to keep my mind on just the present moment for a good half hour. It was tough but just being in the moment without worrying about the past or the future is nice. Tonight I'm going to do some studying and then call it a night.

 

Day 16

Part 1

I went out to an American Outlaws (American Soccer Team supporters) viewing party at a bar. I had kept saying I was going to go, but I finally did for the quarterfinal match of the Copa America cup. It was awesome!!! I was worried because I went by myself, but it was a great time!!! We won!!!

Part 2

I am still in a place where I have some important things to do, but I brush them off. I plan on sitting down this weekend and making a list of what I need to do and when I need to do it by.

 

Day 17

Part 1

I helped my little sister cook tonight. It was a good time and I got to know more about her life. I cannot wait to mess with any guy she dates XD.

Part 2

Still need to be productive some this weekend. Maybe I will wake up semi early and get stuff done.