Giving oral sex during reboot

Good to hear giving oral works for you! Keep it up but stay clear of receiving oral during hardmode.

 

I had a similar experience last year.
I had my best sex ever without penetration.
All my energies were on pleasing her ( without going down on her)
But it was only a matter of time until i relapsed big time.
Only few people have the skill of playing with fire without getting burnt.

I believe it does slow down your healing.
Because you are doing it to change your relationship with pleasure.
Kissing and hugging should be your goal.
If she loves you , they will be heaven to her. If she doesn't, you are with the wrong person.

 

So how long do you expect your girlfriend or wife to go without sex while you’re in hard mode? Contrary to popular belief, women need and desire sex too. I love my boyfriend but I still feel rejected when I want to orgasm but he can’t even touch me without it affecting his recovery. I kind of figure 6 months is reasonably the longest I should wait. It’s been a year since we started working on my boyfriend’s recovery. But he slips up and then I’m stuck rebooting along with him and being put on hold again and again. And the 6 months never ends.

I just think it’s incorrect to say that “if she loves you she won’t want sex.” By that same reasoning, “if he loved me he wouldn’t look at porn.” So either he doesn’t love me, or he does and he has an addiction. And for women, either she doesn’t or she does and she requires sexual intimacy to feel your love and to bond.

I get waiting, but there needs to be a determined amount of time agreed on and then someday you’ve got to be able to talk yourself through the trigger because the triggers aren’t always what’s unhealthy and they’re going to be around you, no matter what.

 

Very reasonable opinion! I would even argue that 6 months is too long.

 

I agree, I just don’t know when it’ll be right again. And that’s makes things difficult.

 

It is difficult and you have to find the solution that feels right for you. I feel like you already know you have to be harder on him. He is harder on you than on himself and that's not good. Curing PIED can take a long time but after 90 days of hardmode you should start some sexual activity again, oral is a great way to do so. Things will eventually get better erection-wise if he keeps staying away from PM. If you don't see any improvement get ED pills. Btw the porn addiction will probably not go away anytime soon so it's critical to stay away from it just like former alcoholics have to stay away from alcohol forever to stay under control.