A journey towards sucess

Hi. Welcome to forum!

To be able to speak fluently in English you have to practice. You do that either talking a lot or writing a lot - writing exercises the same parts of the brain as speaking when it comes to fluency. So be active participant in forums. This ones and also other ones (whatever topics you enjoy). Join some Discord chats and talk a lot there. Get a blog and write in it daily. eventually you will become fluid. Now obviously writing does not make your spoken pronunciation better. But it will make you fluid.

Make sure you create a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges and triggers. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!

 

Awesome! Calmness is one of the first benefits you get.

Eventually you will start to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings. Always when I got horny I went to PMO. There was a trigger (hot girl, boredom, stress, etc), reaction (arousal, need for mental stimulation, need to relax, etc) and action (masturbation). Almost like walking - we don't think what muscles to move when, our body knows it and does it for us. Then eventually I started to notice that I was horny (not just noticing in a background but bringing that feeling in foreground). That noticing introduces space and in that space there is potential for choice. And if there is no potential for choice then we can not exercise discipline. That will be probably second major benefit you will notice.

The third will be increase of that space. It will also become more pronounced. And because we begin to observe these feelings for longer and see them more pronounced we get desensitized to them. Eventually we learn to not care about them. It takes a while to get till that place but meditation does this. That's when nothing moves us. Some Buddhist monks burn themselves alive while meditating in a lotus position, without single movement in their body. Now obviously you wont do such extremes. But it shows what meditation is capable of. If one can do that then you can imagine a mere urge to release some tiny, itching tension is nothing in comparison.

Awesome. I've heard it's a good book. Improving vocabulary is good idea. Reading won't make you more fluid speaker though.