201 days of freedom

Asgardian36 · Dec 20, 2019

Bull87 said: ↑

I reached 6 months last month and meant to post on here as a way to celebrate my sobriety, but I was too busy with finals. I also just got done with my first semester of college, something I’d never thought I would start, because I was too afraid of it being a waste of time (I never finished anything I started) But staying away from porn has given me a new mind and focus that I have never experience in my 32 years of living.

So that no one is left wondering and can have a more complete idea of my sobriety. I am single at 32. I intend to stay single for at least 6 more months, when I make it a year of no porn, no masturbation, no orgasm (except for occasional wet dream). I want to be well before my next relationship, which to me that means vulnerability and responsibility. Porn disorganized my brain for more or less two decades, so I did not expect for it to be completely organized in 90 days.

I had very dark days in the beginning of this journey, and those days still come around but I would say they have lessen 90%.

Staying sober will not resolve all of your issues but it will give you a clear mind and new abilities to deal with life’s obstacles from a new perspective. It will give you the ability to build discipline to stay alert to triggers that have lead you back to porn in the past. And one of the most important.. is that a life free of porn will give you the desire for true connection with people.

If it was not for my friends that many times cannot even relate to me and my porn addiction, yet they listen and many times direct and encouragement me, I don’t know where I would be. NoFap & Fortify App have been a huge blessing, too. For the past 201 days I have come here every single day to do a journal entry. Also reading other’s posts have been encouraging and have added good tools to my own journey.

Lastly, this is not my first time trying to stay sober (it is the longest). My fight against pornography started nearly two years ago with many many failures, tears, anger, self pity, lying, restlessness, and desperation. I learned from my failures, I paid attention to my triggers and wrote down my before and after watching pornography emotions/feelings. I became a student of my reactions and I learned, I am still learning, I am still recovering, I am still in the fight. But I am winning, and when I look back it’s because of my many losses.

I’m so thankful for God’s grace in the process. And I’m thankful for you guys, too. Be kind to yourselves, relapsing is hell, and not to sound like a broken record: study your failures, do not react to it like you always have by beating yourself up, but rather love yourself, and begin that process by studying yourself.
Thank you for reading &
Peace out, warriors
Click to expand...

dude!!!! I am so glad for you! Keep it going, man!!!

Bull87 · Dec 22, 2019

Di.Do.555 said: ↑

Wow. Keep the good work mate.
Remember to love yourself unconditionally day in day out no matter the circumstances.
God bless you
Click to expand...

Thank you for the reminder.

Bull87 · Dec 22, 2019

Asgardian36 said: ↑

dude!!!! I am so glad for you! Keep it going, man!!!
Click to expand...

Thank you!

Porn Craver · Dec 22, 2019

Bull87 said: ↑

I reached 6 months last month and meant to post on here as a way to celebrate my sobriety, but I was too busy with finals. I also just got done with my first semester of college, something I’d never thought I would start, because I was too afraid of it being a waste of time (I never finished anything I started) But staying away from porn has given me a new mind and focus that I have never experience in my 32 years of living.

So that no one is left wondering and can have a more complete idea of my sobriety. I am single at 32. I intend to stay single for at least 6 more months, when I make it a year of no porn, no masturbation, no orgasm (except for occasional wet dream). I want to be well before my next relationship, which to me that means vulnerability and responsibility. Porn disorganized my brain for more or less two decades, so I did not expect for it to be completely organized in 90 days.

I had very dark days in the beginning of this journey, and those days still come around but I would say they have lessen 90%.

Staying sober will not resolve all of your issues but it will give you a clear mind and new abilities to deal with life’s obstacles from a new perspective. It will give you the ability to build discipline to stay alert to triggers that have lead you back to porn in the past. And one of the most important.. is that a life free of porn will give you the desire for true connection with people.

If it was not for my friends that many times cannot even relate to me and my porn addiction, yet they listen and many times direct and encouragement me, I don’t know where I would be. NoFap & Fortify App have been a huge blessing, too. For the past 201 days I have come here every single day to do a journal entry. Also reading other’s posts have been encouraging and have added good tools to my own journey.

Lastly, this is not my first time trying to stay sober (it is the longest). My fight against pornography started nearly two years ago with many many failures, tears, anger, self pity, lying, restlessness, and desperation. I learned from my failures, I paid attention to my triggers and wrote down my before and after watching pornography emotions/feelings. I became a student of my reactions and I learned, I am still learning, I am still recovering, I am still in the fight. But I am winning, and when I look back it’s because of my many losses.

I’m so thankful for God’s grace in the process. And I’m thankful for you guys, too. Be kind to yourselves, relapsing is hell, and not to sound like a broken record: study your failures, do not react to it like you always have by beating yourself up, but rather love yourself, and begin that process by studying yourself.
Thank you for reading &
Peace out, warriors
Click to expand...

Wow, awesomeness. Salute to you and your efforts. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

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201 days of freedom

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201 days of freedom

Asgardian36 Fapstronaut

Bull87 Fapstronaut NoFap Defender

Bull87 Fapstronaut NoFap Defender

Porn Craver Fapstronaut

Share This Page

Bull87 Fapstronaut

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