Sex Chat Sites

I'm glad I found this thread! Chat rooms have been a MUCH bigger problem for me than internet porn! You enter a room of 100 people and you're convinced that one of them is going to give you the fix you need, so the search begins. You approach 20 people. You strike up conversations with 10 of them. They all turn out to be wrong in one way or another. And so the search continues... and continues. And then you find the fix you've been looking for! And the conversation last for hours... but then she (or the man pretending to be a girl, as I suspect is often the case) has to leave, and you haven't orgasmed yet, so the search begins again. And on and on and on it goes. And because you're dealing with "real" people (more or less), the excitement is heightened. You never know what you'll get.

But in the end, you just feel terrible! Terrible about yourself for wasting your life in front of a computer chatting with god-knows-who. Terrible about other people and their twisted relationships with sex and other human beings. And just... terrible.

When I feel weak with my NoFap progress (I'm only on day 4 of NoFap, so I don't have much to talk about), it's sex chat that I crave.

 

You've got it in one. Any stories of spending hours in chat rooms or the dreadful effects afterwards?

 

I had a real problem with chat at one time. I would sign on, and spend many hours, late into the night. What's worse, is that I signed on with a fake name, even to the point of using someone else's picture. Lots of people wanted to meet, but I did not. I wanted only to chat and masturbate. It was incredibly dishonest; I'd invent a whole other person. And it got to be really hard, because I wanted a very particular fantasy, and most of the guys I chatted with didn't want that, or couldn't really do what I wanted. I'd be online for half the night, and get nothing out of it.

 

Amazing how quickly time goes in chat rooms.

 

My wife works on Sundays, leaving me home alone with the computer all day. Every Saturday I would make great plans of the things I would do the next day: practical stuff like yard work, or fun stuff like surfing with a friend. Instead, I would spend every Sunday on sex chat sites. My wife would be gone for 9 hours, and I would waste the entire 9 hours on sex chat sites. This coming Sunday will be the first Sunday I haven't wasted in years.

 

As well as sex stories, chat room is the other part of it for me. I don't even LIKE porn, at ALL, but sex stories and sex chat can be arousing for me. The thing is, usually I can do clean chats in the room but then certain names are a trigger and on the odd occasion one of them has messaged me and started it. I LIKE the chatroom I go to a lot. I've had good normal conversations in there too and I've used it to ask a ton of advice about guys and got help as it's mostly guys IN that chatroom and there's also a guy I esp. like to chat to in there (but I have his email now too anyway). I'm also quite introverted at times and get busy with work (I'in m a teacher and I can find it exhausting and sometimes term-times I've done 10-12 hour days at work in the past and it tires me so I don't want to go out more than once a fortnight socially, but I get lonely & crave interaction with other humans ) so socially I really love the interaction of the chatroom I use. But it's also a trigger for me to go down a dark path and I can relate to the spending hours masturbating to filthy chats - and not just filthy, my brain started to crave hearing really twisted things - thing all too well and waking up the next day after little sleep feeling tired or in the day thinking that it's kinda sad I wasted hours on THAT rather than playing a game, watching something, going for a walk or whatever! I also made myself have a year off men so it's been my only real non-platonic interaction with men for nearly a year and i like flirting with them (and being asked out a lot!) and I was even role-playing a "first date" the other night (to give me some confidence when I go out there again for real!) So I DON'T want to give up my chatroom I like but if it's the only way I can kick this time-wasting habit - and yes, I think in some situations it can be a bit of a mind-warper too - then I may have to let it go, at least for a few months till I can chat without a relapse. And I'm female. Sigh!
Not so much this time but the last time I wasted hours in a chatroom and stayed up until into the morning, I had a big tiredness headache the next day and thought of all the other things I could have spent those hours on.

(I'm also debating breaking my man-break 3-4 weeks early and start looking for real men to date in my city (in the UK) rather than this fake getting off to chat thing with strangers. Date as in have real conversations and dates with, I don't mean bonking the world!)

But, gosh, the time-wasting part of it really gets to me at times and I want to stop this!

 

It was the increasing depravity of my sex chats that finally got me to come here! I was clearly drifting into dangerous waters, and I seemed unable to control where I was heading. I needed more, I needed something "sexier," kinkier, dirtier... And I was always able to find it, as long as I was willing to chat for hours while I looked for it. This is where I was finally starting to put myself in harms way, endangering my job, endangering my relationships. I'm only on Day 14 of no PMO, but I really can't go back there... it's like a black hole that sucks everything into it.

 

Chat rooms are the reason I'm here. In total, I've wasted months of my life talking dirty to other men while getting off. I feel nothing but shame thinking back to those sad, empty nights as my partner was asleep in the next room. I finally joined this community after I began M'ing with other men over cam. And I'm straight. For me, it was about the emotions and the one to one interaction. And I was never honest about who I was (like most I imagine). I'm on day 8 today and I'm determined never to visit another chat room in my life. It sucks the life out of you and your relationship.

 

Hang in there, JonathanDoe! I know the shame you're talking about. I would often play the role of my own wife chatting with other men, or my wife chatting with girls (it was always easier to meet people playing the role of a woman). I was certainly never honest about who I was. The entire thing always felt so pathetic after I got off the computer, but as soon as I turned the computer on, it was straight to the chat room I'd go. I'm with you... never again!

 

the dopamine rush is more than porn in sex chat sites. because in porn you are just watching some other people are doing sex. but in sex chat sites is like you are acting on porn. it is more addictive than porn. I spent afternoon 2 pm to next morning 5 am in the sex sites with edging. it is worst of all. still i have passion to have chat. but not to watch porn.

 

Thanks @capt. freedom, I'm glad I'm not the only one who has this problem. I can't believe I let things get this bad. The whole thing for me was just the ultimate experience and so will be more difficult for me to overcome. I'm determined though. Thanks again and best of luck to you too.

 

I was the partner sleeping in bed.
When I found out my bf was talking to other people that hurt 1000xs more then him just watching porn. He talked to men also which totally blew my mind. I was certain he was gay or bi. Thankfully he is straight!
It's all disgusting bullshit... Keep away!

 

Thanks Rav. I don't intend to visit another chat room ever again. Your perspective has really hit home for me. You're right, it is disgusting...and morally wrong.

 

My 22 day streak ended because of sex chat. I just relapsed a while ago, totally not worth it. HOCD and lack of energy is coming back.

 

Well said. Chat is way more addictive than porn, I agree. My feelings of anxiety, my desire to explore dark topics, and my overall addiction are entirely chat-related. For as perverse as my chat had become, I still looked at very light porn (Playboy type stuff). But my chat conversations were dragging me down a dangerous path, and fast.

 

Wow, I can totally relate to that! Weekends have been the worst in my case! The number of hours I would spend on chat sites have depended greatly on what my wife was doing at the same time. Sometimes, she would just be next door watching a movie or reading, and I am masturbating over girls in chat rooms. Sometimes 3-4 hours in a row. What a total waste of time on weekends! And often even on both days, Saturday and Sunday!

 

I use to spend hours on them a day edging for hours

 

With you on that Revenant, such a waste of time and energy.

 

I am really ashamed to say this now.

I am addicted to social interaction and I have been trying to find people to sext and chat with.

I sexted almost everyday, and I even went to cam with other guys, the compliments and praises I get when they see me gives me such a rush that I couldn't afford to stop. Made a Skype account just for that.

Role played with older guys and pretended about my age.

I made a naughty account in kik and tried to find guys younger or older than me who will dominate, order me around and call me names..

I am ashamed to say that I have spent times on it being a slave and I lost all my self respect, I don't know if I even love myself anymore for accepting my fate of being this submissive.

I have broken a lot of relationships with guys whom I used to help before, because of this fucking cravings to be abused. A lot of then has blocked me now because of all the times I made some sexual advances.

I am still struggling to get out of it. And I would be glad if anyone can help me with it. Finding people who know the struggle is hard enough.