New and 35 days into Rebooting

Hey guys, I am new here.
Here is my story. I am 30 years old, and I have 20 years of fapping history. When I was 4 I learned how to masturbate. But from that time till the age of 10, it was more of a random occasional thing, so I am really counting the year starting from when I was 10.

I want to make this brief or it will get too long.
But basically, I have experienced all sort of decline in my life after I consistently masturbated for an entire summer in grade 9, my physical dominance in PE has for some reason gone away. And at the age of 21, I for the first time experienced a certain level of dysfunction in erection when watching porn. I went to the doctor and he freaking told me I am fine and there is nothing I need to worry about, and I just need to get a real woman to turn me on more... I am very very mad at the fact that in our society there is still a fairly common belief that masturbation does nothing bad to you, and it mislead so many people.

I have tried abstinence many many times in the past, but the longest I came to was 1 month, and every time I relapsed, I lost more confidence because I had to start all over again, so I recommend everyone, do not allow yourself to break the flow! Also, the longer you go on NoFap, the more sense of achievement you will get, because the number of days is adding up higher and higher and eventually you are literally breaking a new record of your life every single new day! and How great is that!

Now that I am 30, and a while ago I have just lost my virginity for the first time, and basically for 3 times with the actual girl, I did not achieve an erection, the 3rd time I had a very mild one and I was done in 5 sec. After that real life experience, I have finally realized how severe my body condition was in, so for real this time, I am taking Nofap till the very very end. At the moment like in my title, I am at 35th day. The next time I come, has to be with a real girl who I interacted with in real life!

Also I am experiencing some health issue I believe.I am experiencing a sense of sensation many times after I pee, and then there is white pudding-like things that comes out of my penis. They definitely look like semen. This happened after I abstained for 1 week after I broke my virginity with the real girl. I have done testing to confirm that I have no other diseases. But right now I still get that white semen-like things, which I will post in detail in the other category!

Thanks guys!

 

To The Serpent of Fire

Thank you so much for your kind words! I really appreciate it!
Yes, definitely, meditation is something I have been considering for a long time, though I admit, I do it more on random basis, but it should be a consistent thing everyday! I have also heard about people who did meditation that eventually cured themselves from cancer! It sounds quite incredible!