-
Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.Dismiss Notice
Post published by Believe85
Another fall in a hotel room last night. A few drinks at dinner plus feelings of anxiety Plus smart phone in hand equals sin de idiom to begin searches that bring up images I should stay entirely away from. It was as if my neurotransmitters and a voice from the pit were both Screaming for attention. I succumbed.
This leaves me saying once again,Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within. Cast me not away from the presence and take not the Holy Spirit from me.
I believe if I confess my sins I have a chance of being healed. Every time this happens I need to confess online here anonymously or to a brother in Christ who knows me.
Then I can go on with my day feeling as if I at least took a shower.
I can go weeks and sometimes months But cannot seem to say goodbye to this forever.
I admit my powerlessness and need for my higher power, Jesus Christ, to rid me of this just as my dad gave up alcohol And stayed sober for 25 years until he died.
more_vert
St3v0
I know the feeling of wanting to look at "innocent" pictures all the while knowing where they will lead to.
For me even shopping online on Wish is a huge no no. All those adverts of lingerie and girls posing in shorts had me escalating to POM very fast.
Stay strong and Remember
You are not as bad as your last sin. Jesus still sees you as His beloved child.
dethly likes this.
more_vert
Bob385
Thank you for this. I can relate to nearly everything you wrote here. Praying through Psalm 51 after a fall. Being clean for weeks or months before a fall recurs. I have fallen prey to hotel room porn where it was available and this is a real problem due to its easy access.
mrothell likes this.
more_vert
Bob385
What were the triggers in this situation? Too much alcohol definitely makes me more susceptible and lowers my guard. Just one image lodging in my brain can cause escalation in wanting to look for more. I excuse myself by telling myself I've already overstepped the mark, I may as well carry on...I zone in to my craving and become anaesthetised to the real world. So avoiding those triggers/ temptations can really help. And when I've slipped the only way out is to confess and repent right at the start, otherwise it becomes incredibly hard.
more_vert
HigherPower72
Wow! Your father's sobriety is a wonderful example of which to draw inspiration from, blessings to you as you move forward with this battle.
more_vert
Vendettana
You must take a decision. You have to be serious about that. It's not about "trying". When you really decide that it is over, the whole process will be much easier. Can you tell yourself that you will never sin on porn? That you will never watch it again? How does this make you feel? If there is an inner thought of "nah, not for over, maybe sometime in the future", then evil will break you again and again.
Bob385 likes this.
