Yet Another Porn Addict

Age: 27
Race: 1/2 Black, 1/2 White
Education: Bachelors of Science in Computer Science
Appearance: Clean cut, tall, fit, good looking
Physical disabilities: none
Addictions: prostitution, porn, tv/movies

I am that popular guy you know. That guy that is friends with everybody. That guy that is late, that guy you don't really see anymore because he has isolated himself.
I joined a forum like this ~5 years ago. I posted a few times and tried journaling but eventually gave it up.

I am addicted to watching porn and then meeting prostitutes, my addictive preference is to do this in a binge where I watch porn for hours (24-48 hours) and then meet 2-3 girls (or guys.. or girl/guys).

Something to note about that last bit... I consider myself straight, and when not under the influence of porn I find myself attracted to women, but when I am in pornland normal girls are considered boring and my sexual preferences are subverted for the increased exciting of something novel, the fact that it goes against straight inclinations makes me feel confused, this confusion gives me an emotional boost that adds to the cravings.

Similarly one of my leading fantasies ATM is having my girl friend cheat on me. Whatever consequences may come of this and no matter how against it I am in principal I find it sexually irresistible.

As it turns out the more destructive something is the more I am sexually turned on to it. I have no doubt that in a few years I will die in some attempt to achieve an orgasm doing something dangerous.

So that is why I am here. Day 1. Hour 1. Minute 1.

I can go into all the history, the countless people I have slept with, the fake pregnancies and abortions, the hundreds of thousands of dollars I have spent on prostitutes, the abuse and sexually confusing experiences I suffered as a child, the lack of support from friends and family. But, what matters right now is I am here, I am awake, and I am starting a NoFap Challenge.

Thank you for reading this post and your support my brothers and sisters.