Yet another PMO addict

Hi Bob and welcome. Would you like to share those severe effects so we know how we can help you?

 

It is quite alarming how porn and excessive masturbation can disturb our interactions with others. Sometimes consciously or subconsciously, it feels like if you have direct eye contact with others they will know you have been jerking off to porn! Consequently, you are in an almost constant state of embarrassment and plummeting self esteem. So, yes, I can relate to how you feel. A ten day break from PMO was very good. The 2-4 day relapse cycle is called the chaser effect which is defined in The Glossary ^.

One of the underlying principles that really helps to build up your resilience to temptation is being strict with yourself. So, we all have a range of tactics, boundaries and countermeasures. But these do not serve us well if we are 'flexible'. If we decide something is a boundary, then we must follow it with no exceptions and no excuses. Let me illustrate:

You might decide not to take your smartphone to the bathroom (if this is where you masturbate to porn and clean up). But it is no good if you allow yourself to do it sometimes because - whatever the reason or pretext is - then you will fail. Or if you use a porn blocker on your devices but occasionally get around it because it blocks some sites that are actually OK. Because, then, your sex-addled brain will nag at you that there are some 'perfect' videos of your favourite fetish etc.

 

Think about the negative effects of PMO and what you want to achieve with NoFap. Your why will strengthen your motivation and help you ride out the tough urges. Try to remember what you were doing and thinking before you relapsed. Understanding triggers will help you avoid putting yourself in compromising situations that lead to relapse. Learn to deal with emotions. Strong emotion is a huge trigger.