Willingly entering stress, when is it bad?

Sure, putting yourself in new situations is good.

Always keep in mind though - stress and anxiety are not always the same thing. Anxiety often lets us know when we're not ready for something, or something dangerous is happening. Don't put yourself in those situations just for the sake of it, since putting yourself in unnecessary danger may not end well.

Putting yourself out there and doing things you wouldn't normally do (in a safe way!) is great though. This could be anything from experiencing new social environments, talking with new people, going overseas, etc.

 

Check out the word Eustress:

From Wikipedia:
Eustress occurs when the gap between what one has and what one wants is slightly pushed, but not overwhelmed. The goal is not too far out of reach but is still slightly more than one can handle. This fosters challenge and motivation since the goal is in sight. The function of challenge is to motivate a person toward improvement and a goal.[7] Challenge is an opportunity-related emotion that allows people to achieve unmet goals.[8] Eustress is indicated by hope and active engagement.[9] Eustress has a significantly positive correlation with life satisfaction and hope.[6] However, experiencing chronic stress, either in the form of distress or eustress, is negative.[10]

 

Love this kind of stuff. Thanks for posting. Main reason I still hang out here.

I think, if i understand correctly, you are asking about taking getting comfortable with discomfort too far? And I think of course this is true. You can imagine working on withstanding torture without flinching... this may be a handy skill in a cruel primitive warfare scenario... but as far as leading you to a more fulfilling happy life it would likely be extremely unhelpful... (also ironically it may not actually even help you with self discipline)

Likewise it is important to relax and seek contentment... yet both too little and too much will have a different set of problems.

But clearly in my own case I tend to avoid discomfort even when it is clearly good for me to be ok with it

 

As everyone is stating, we each have our own capacity to handle stress. Once we realize we need to increase the capacity for whatever reason, we need to do so methodically. Its just like building a muscle, breaking it down with each training session. Too much weight for the muscle and injury occurs.

Life experience will tend to show us what were naturally capable of. For us to go past this natural barrier we have to want it. Usually once the seed of desire for something has sprouted in our mind, the will takes over and either gets it or doesn't.

Learning who you are inside, what your made of, is part of the challenge. Take a step back and reflect on this. The answer is already inside of you, you just need to be clear minded to ask yourself the right questions and shoot for the appropriate goals. Then your unstoppable.

 

I was looking through my writings because I remember studying this very topic a few years ago. I wrote a short blurb about it...

The essence of productivity is not ones ability to do or even having a specialized skill-set for the task at hand. While those qualities are important they are not the core of getting things done. The core or essence of productivity is ones own ability to handle stress. In other words, having the feeling of vigor and positivity during times of apparent crisis. This eustress is actually more important than completed staff work, and must be learned before real productivity can be achieved.

I believe this internal adaptation to any situation can be likened to sympathy versus empathy. Where sympathy is understanding and compassion from the outside, empathy is the core of true human understanding and must be learned before all other forms of acceptance. Even the two concepts of eustress and empathy can and should be used in harmony for a group of people to conquer monumental tasks.

Truly effective people are not necessarily eloquent or skilled at first, nor do they need to be efficient in the beginning, as efficiency only comes after knowledge and experience of a given subject is learned, not before.

 

Here is what the writing looks like in one complete work. Funny how one was written years ago and the other just now, both linking together. Hope this invokes thought...

The essence of productivity is not ones ability to do or even having a specialized skill-set for the task at hand. While those qualities are important they are not the core of getting things done. The core or essence of productivity is ones own ability to handle stress. In other words, having the feeling of vigor and positivity during times of apparent crisis. This eustress is actually more important than completed staff work, and must be learned before real productivity can be achieved.

I believe this internal adaptation to any situation can be likened to sympathy versus empathy. Where sympathy is understanding and compassion from the outside, empathy is the core of true human understanding and must be learned before all other forms of acceptance. Even the two concepts of eustress and empathy can and should be used in harmony for a group of people to conquer monumental tasks.

Truly effective people are not necessarily eloquent or skilled at first, nor do they need to be efficient in the beginning, as efficiency only comes after knowledge and experience of a given subject is learned, not before.

We each have our own capacity to handle stress. Once we realize we need to increase the capacity for whatever reason, we need to do so methodically. Its just like building a muscle, breaking it down with each training session. Too much weight for the muscle and injury occurs.

Life experience will tend to show us what were naturally capable of. For us to go past this natural barrier we have to want it. Usually once the seed of desire for something has sprouted in our mind, the will takes over and either gets it or doesn't.

Learning who you are inside, what your made of, is part of the challenge. Take a step back and reflect on this. The answer is already inside of you, you just need to be clear minded to ask yourself the right questions and shoot for the appropriate goals. Then your unstoppable.

 

Building a muscle, same thing.

 

Were talking about capacity here, its not really high philosophy, think simply.

How do you handle traffic? Do you get frustrated in a traffic jam?

How do you handle a co-worker who isnt being cooperative? Do you fly off the handle? Argue?

We slowly develop more capacity, internal power, by handling the events of everyday life with equanimity.

 

No need to intentionally do anything, life does that for us automatically. Do you go outside and work, attend school, shop? Life presents us with the tools to improve, we dont create them. We simply react appropriately and gain strength/wisdom/knowledge depending on what we do.

We do attract situations though, usually its something we need to work on. When we conquer a certain reaction, the situation will also not occur as frequently. If it does, were just not aware of it as much, as it creates no ripple in our mind.

 

I want to look at this sentence. Im glad you continued the discussion and I dont mean to prove you wrong, I just want to understand better.

In my world, I dont avoid something I'm not good at. Its the opposite, I face it head on. But I also dont seek it to better myself, I let it come to me. You see it would be easy to force yourself into a situation and come out the victor. "Oh, today im going to purposefully spill coffee on myself, so that I face that fear." This would be pointless because you know its going to happen. In life, we face the greatest difficulty in the spontaneous. When something just blindsides you, thats when your reaction means the most. Thats when permanent learning takes place in the mind. Setting yourself up will not create the same effect to the brain.

So Im saying try to see it from that perspective for one or two days. Take whatever comes at you and react from the intellect, not from emotion. After awhile there wont be any situation that shakes you, or anything that you must seek, because you will have trained your willpower to the point that it can take on any situation.

You dont need to build strength in specific areas most of the time, what we need is a foundation of strength, a foundation of solid character and attitude traits that we internalize. Then we dont actually work on the situation itself, our nature, being strong, handles it.