Why I will not PMO anymore

My sixteen-day streak ended, longest one I had in a while. After that, I had a few shorter-than-ever streaks that really defeated my confidence. Therefore, I did this writing.

Extended journal, why I will not PMO anymore.

Many say that MO can be a healthy activity. That debate crossed my mind quite often a while back, but now I am fully convinced by the opposite. My life is simply much, much happier and better when there is no MO.

There is always temptations. It's easy to write on a journal after relapse, but after a few days, the temptations and tensions build up. When this happens, we have to rely on our firm principles and willpower.

For me, the most simple thing is:
1. I am tired of living a double life when I MO.
2. MO makes my life worse.

Our mind succumbs to pleasure. When that happens, step one is to take our mind away from the pleasure. Think about all the other things in life. Look around you, try to remember the colors and arrangements of objects, take the focus away from pleasure. Subconsciously understand that you don't need that pleasure.

Always remember the pain and emptiness I feel after a relapse. If I ever question if nofap is worth it, think about the two different lives -- one fulfilled, one empty. It doesn't happen ten years later, it can happen two weeks later.

When the urge gets too strong, don't give up. There are many times I battled through an urge. After the first wave of urge fades, I might still crave pleasure. Accept it. Accept the feeling of discomfort, but don't see it as discomfort, see it as a necessary process of growth.

Never, never feel that it's okay to MO. After a long streak, I have many short streaks, because of the chaser and the urges. You didn't just kill this streak, you killed many future streaks. On the other hand, you battle and beat the urge once, you save yourself many many future streaks.

Remember, just because you had a one-day streak or two-day streak, doesn't mean your next streak can't be long. My sixteen-day streak ensued my two-day streak. My twelve-day streak ensued a one-day streak. Everytime is a fresh beginning.