I dont think I am an alpha male. I dont want to compete with other men for material position, power or attention. What I like in life is to make others happy, make them trust me, help others, make them comfortable, protect the weak, give attention to the persons who are sad, achieve something in life, raise a good child who will carry my life into this world.In bed, I wont demand a blowjob or sex. I wont take her by force or pursue her when she dont show interest in me. I wont waste my time for the women who dont love me or who dont deserve my love. I dont waste my time for thick headed women. I dont like women who flirt to all the men. I dont like the women who thinks she need a dominant man. I dont like the women who became easy prey to alpha man. what I want in the women is love. I should be able to be who i am with her. i should be able to trust her. I need her to be strong and feminine. She should listen to me. I wont entertain her submissive needs. She can be submissive to the man she loves but she shouldnt love a man because she can be submissive to him. I have kinky side. I can be a asshole but i choose not to. I like to think that I am a civilised man. I could demand for manythings from others, in work, in home etc.., but i chose not to. because i feel others pain and happiness. I treat others in the way how i wanted to be treated. I help my mother and sister in everyway because I know their hard work and sacrifice for this family. I help my collegues and friends because they are wonderful people and i like to hang out with them and helping them gives me satisfaction and pleasure. I hate that all the romantic novels are full of some kind of rape stories. I hate women who read that stuffs(seriously search in goodreads). I know men read lot of stuffs too but they read only for sex. they(I) dont classify based on her ability to control the situation or whether she is a alpha or beta or omega. How can I be happy in a relationship when my women find my alpha asshole friend to be attractive than me. The thought of my women pussy will get wet when she read about some rapist asshole fuck other women is totally disappointing to me. it is creating anxiety in me. Why do they think they deserve this level of attention, lust from other man. By making us compete with ourselfs they are just sitting and choosing the one that will wet their pussy. I dont classify myself as a alpha or beta or omega. I am just a man who have duties, responsibilities and friends. I dont complain, I am not much of a sensitive person, I can kill a snake if i wanted, I am strong, I have a good body, I am intellegent, I make stupit jokes to make others happy, I love my hobbies, I competetive when it comes to games, I can convince others to think that my idea is best than others. I love to eat pussy, I dont like to choke or gag her, I dont like to take her by force, I dont grab her neck when i make love, I like to caress her skin and enjoy her body, i dont act on lust, i wont do certain thinks even she asks me to like facial, anal, slapping, forcing her etc.., i have a high sex drive but i wont demand for sex, sex wont be in my thoughts all the time, I like to make her happy by giving her gifts, I like to cuddle her or sometimes look at her when she is not looking at me and think of how lucky i am to have her. I like to look at her body when she talks and think about how beutiful she is and how hot it will to take her when she is talking about her day. I dont like when is laughing and talking with other men or having conversation with other men about their personal life. Due to my anxiety and nice personality i dont compete with other men. Often i will just walk away when i am in awfull situations. I respect everyone eventhough when they treats me badly because I am that way. I can easily loose my temper which will leads to several problems. Once I beat a friend in school then i beat my roomate who is a very tallented person and I hate that i loose my temper on that time that cost our friendship. Once in work i lost by temper and had a arguement with two ladies which is becomes soo degrading to me. I lost respect and then I quit the job eventhough the owner offer to fire them. After that incidents I am very carefull of my temper. I dont talk when I have anxiety of anger. I walk away. I breath deep and sometimes puch walls. why women are like this?
Who is this woman ("her") that you're talking about? Is it a real partner, like a wife or girlfriend, that has started flirting or cheating with other, more "alpha" guys? Or is it a woman that you do not know yet but imagine you will meet in the future? I'm asking this because you seem to be making a lot of assumptions. That all women are like this. I don't know why it seems like women enjoy 50 Shades of Grey, the novel about the rich and dominant man who convinces, with emotional and sexual abuse, a virgin woman to love him. But I know for a fact that not all women enjoy that kind of stuff. Some might fantasize about it, and a woman (maybe @Limeaid?) may be able to explain why. And I have one more point, about this: "i wont do certain thinks even she asks me to like facial, anal, slapping, forcing her etc." Why not? Why not do these things if she wants them? I guess if she wants them all the time, and never wants to do something that you enjoy, like cuddling, then it's not not good for you. But if she occasionally asks for something out of your comfort zone, shouldn't you try it if you want to please her? I think it's highly unrealistic that you'll find a partner who gets pleasure from all the same things, and nothing more, that you do.
Anytime someone refers to a human male as an 'alpha' or 'beta' male, I have to stop myself from going on a page long rant as to why those terms used on animals like wolves should not be used for human beings, but it is just so much easier to drop this Cracked reference that says enough, #1. Stop Hiding Behind the "Alpha" Label You are not an alpha male; you're just being marketed to. Some jaded hipster dickhead in lensless eyeglasses that cost more than your house used the entire "alpha" movement to sell you energy drinks and those shirts that look like douchebag scrimshaw. Human beings are not wolves. We're not even pack hunters anymore. Modern society has no place for an alpha, a beta, or anything resembling a carnivorous predatory social structure. "Alpha" is just a positive-sounding synonym for "asshole," and it is not an acceptable excuse for behaving like a cocksock, because the sad reality is, there is never an excuse for behaving like a cocksock. Wouldn't it be nice if there were? If there were some social theory, psychological disorder, or gypsy curse you could use to excuse your off-putting behavior? It sure would. But there never has been, and there never will be. It was all a giant lie sold to you by Big Energy to trick you into a mild stimulant addiction, an untruth you received free with every three-pack of TapouT shirts. I understand why it seems reasonable at first. What is an alpha male if not a beloved antihero, a Wolverine or Han Solo type? Did you agree with that statement? You shouldn't have. It was a trick. See, the alpha mentality slipped through our cultural defenses on the back of an actual truth: Confidence and, yes, even cockiness is attractive. Here's the difference: An alpha male embraces the label because he secretly suspects that he might be a face full of dicks and he needs a way to spin that into a positive thing. A confident man would shun the very concept of labels because he knows that that's the shit insecure people use to feel accepted. The very second you open your mouth to self-identify as "alpha," you're admitting that you're too insecure to face life alone and on your own terms. You're giving everybody who speaks to you a disclaimer: "I'm going to be a dick to you, and here's why it's OK and you still have to like me." A truly confident man would never give enough of a shit to make that statement. Being an asshole is like being an alcoholic: The first and most important step is realizing and admitting it. You're not a party animal if you're throwing up rotgut in the parking lot of a Circle K, and you're not an "alpha" if you're harassing uninterested women and trying to start fights with the smallest guy at the bar.
Um. Maybe the problem is you have anger issues and jealousy issues? Have you sought out professional help like a therapist perhaps?
Hmmmm my husband is not alpha and I am not into rape and we have lots of love and sex. If an alpha male was the last man on earth I wouldn't have sex with him (at least the douchebag that keeps getting described over and over as alpha)! Everything you describe about this woman is just something that is being presented to you by someone else, either the media or some PUA balogna. Just like there are all types of men there are all types of women. Don't settle for a woman you don't like or respect, find a woman who likes the things you like. I am not into anal or facials either and I know most women only do this to please their men. Luckily my hubs is not into this either. Unless a woman asks for this (which I don't think is common at all!) then don't assume she is into it. She might just be telling you she is because she is trying to compete with porn and not come across as a "prude". A lot of young girls just want to be liked by boys and in this day and age that comes with pressure to be sexy. 50 shades of grey got a lot of backlash from many many women including myself because it glamorizes abuse BUT at the same time I can understand it's appeal because it feeds on insecure women's ideas of sexual control. Like a modern day beauty and the beast. To tame a powerful man with your sexuality and beauty similar to bedding a beautiful woman by buying her lots of things. I will go out on a limb and say that the women who like this stuff are not very sexually powerful so it is a fantasy. Here is the thing about rape fantasy. In the fantasy that a woman has it is not actually rape. She WANTS the man to take her with unabashed desire and she is pretending not to want it. In the woman's mind she is so hot and desirable she is driving this man to take her with such a great force because he is out of control with desire. For some reason they call this a "rape fantasy" mostly because people do not understand what rape really is. Rape is not consensual. In a "rape" fantasy it is...therefore it is not rape. Some women like to be submissive and some women do not, just like some guys like anal and some guys do not. You just need to find someone that meshes with you.
This series of quotes here shows me that in fact you are an alpha male. I just think you've been confused by others' versions of what an alpha male is supposed to be like. A good definition of an alpha male is: "A man who is unapologetically himself. A man who knows what he wants, why he wants and is determined to get it, despite the risks and potential for failure. A man who marches to the beat of his own drum. A man who is a gentleman, strong, charming, humorous, chivalrous, determined and respectful. A man who will choose walking away versus staying in a relationship that requires him to sacrifice his hopes, goals and dreams to make a woman happy". This quote is from a guy called Coach Corey Wayne. He has a lot of useful videos on youtube, although his focus is mainly about giving relationship advice. I think it is foolish to determine that being an "alpha male" is undesirable. There is a lot of bullshit written online about dating/ sex, personality traits etc. It's easy to put oneself in the victim mindset and start hating those who appear to be "alpha", or whatever else. My advice would be, don't fall for the bullshit that is written online, or what's published in mainstream media sources (it's not all bad but all of it is influenced in some way by the opinions of the writer). Instead find the people in your life who inspire you to be the person you want to be, and use that inspiration to strive towards what you want out of life. I notice you also quoted things like this (above). In fact, this is a characteristic of a beta male (imo) as it suggests neediness.
Yeah I always interpreted "alpha" as just having your own standards and being a strong person. The labels annoy me.
The idea that alpha males are sexier is one of the many misconceptions in our society. I am a woman, and when I see what people call an 'alpha male', I don't find him attractive or even masculine. Why? Because his masculinity is probably dependent on his vehicle, physique, protein powder, and general douchiness. You take all of that away and you're left with an ordinary guy, except he is less than ordinary because he hasn't taken time or energy to develop his personality. You even said it yourself in your post - "my alpha asshole friend". When I'm with a group of girl friends and we're all checking out one guy - I can guarantee that each one of us will have a different reaction to him. Every girl likes different things and certainly not every girl likes an "alpha male". Personally, I cannot be attracted to a guy who doesn't have a good personality. And to me being kind is a requirement. I won't even be friends with a guy who is a jerk. But nice, sweet guys, god, they make me melt. They're wonderful in so many ways. Maybe NoBrainer is right - we just have the wrong idea of what an alpha male really is. And different girls probably have different ideas of what an alpha male could be.
Every time I go somewhere I make sure to piss in all four corners to let others know I'm around and that it's my territory. Alpha life is the best.
Women are strange creatures, so are men. Humans are flawed beings, but have the potential to reach the divine and be really open minded and basically good people although it takes alot of effort to become a noble and worthy person, to regain our inherent purity and wisdom so to speak. I prefer to view 'alpha' type dudes as self absorbed high testosterone males who try a little too hard in the wrong kinds of ways to appear more masculine and confident, often coming across as self centered, egotistical, and shallow minded. As the little paragraph above says, 'A confident man would shun the very concept of labels because he knows that that's the shit insecure people use to feel accepted. The very second you open your mouth to self-identify as "alpha", you're admitting that you're too insecure to face life alone and on your own terms.' I think beating people up has nothing to do with being an alpha male. This isn't the stone ages. Hell even the most masculine, strongest, deadliest trained killers in the military are usually above thinking of themselves as 'alpha'. Moral of the story? Erase that whole alpha male concept from your mind Prakash, and become a genuinely masculine and confident, KIND TO EVERYONE AND NOT VIOLENT guy, http://www.artofmanliness.com. Sounds like you don't identify as an 'alpha' aka high testosterone self absorbed female manipulator douchemonger, but you scare me by describing beating these people close to you up, and the whole situation with the 2 women at work. Perhaps get some therapy as has been mentioned. Beating people up like your roommate is usually a sign of some serious underlying mental or emotional issues.
Most people don't understand the difference between the Divine Feminine/Masculine and the Bestial Feminine/Masculine. Each of us are the Beast and the Divine. Angel and Devil. Like my avatar. Upright and inverted pentagram.
Ever read Dan Brown's Angels and Demons? Omg I loved all his novels so much, I never really was into reading fiction avidly but I dabbled with some Times bestseller master authors' novels back in the day.
Non, unfortunately I saw the movie which may have ruined the book for me. Then again I never would have heard of the book if it wasn't for the movie. Anyway... I'll have to check it out. I'm sure I could find it at the library. I just finished Dune: House Corrino. (The librarian put the wrong cover on the book, I wanted to read Dune, but hey it was a decent book..."
Hahaha . That reminds me of my dog. He's only small but that doesn't stop him from thinking he's a beast.
That's life. Get over it. The guys getting laid aren't concerned with how you feel. Neither are the women. So you can either join the party or continue blaming everyone else for sucking with women. That's what this boils down to. this guy's not getting laid and he's frustrated. Join the club, dude. The difference between you and I, though, is simple: I understand the game that women play. Until you figure out what the game actually is, you will continue to be a shell of your true potential.
As ケンジ mentioned, this is the most concerning part of your post. This suggests you may have some sort of mental illness if you suffer from anxiety and have problems with anger management. As advised above, you should probably seek some councelling/ therapy about this. Btw, here is a good article on what I consider to be traits of an alpha: http://chadhowsefitness.com/2012/11/25-characteristics-of-an-alpha-male Nowhere in this article does it say you have to be an arsehole to get what you want in life. I'm not ashamed to say that I am not an alpha male (I have a lonnng way to go), but it is the type of person that I strive to be and there is no reason why both men and women shouldn't strive to become this kind of person (imo).
I don't know since I'm not the op, but he probably views those thing as objectively degrading, and I would agree.
People who do not believe in this alpha male bullshit and try to stick to themselves and not these horrible labels are criticized and called "white knights". We are stepped on told we are wrong all because this disgusting display of "alpha" masculinity is a dying breed. When I was in high school, that was all that I seen. Douchebags abundant. Now men who do not stick to this cliche label are seen as wrong because of jealousy. OP, I completely understand where you are coming from with your anger. Men wouldn't act like scum if women didn't actually go for it. I'm not saying intellectual women such as @Strugglesaurus or @Limeaid go for this. I'm talking about the majority of women that aren't actually on the smarter side. Women like confidence, but end up going for an asshole because they would rather be with an asshole who treats them like shit than insecure guy who worships them. All men think this way about everything being black or white. Asshole or insecure. I think we all have a skewed view of how the world actually works based upon our experiences. It is wrong to be an asshole to women, but yet, it is seen as normal and actually encouraged through media. Porn is seen as normal and encouraged through media. My point is....not all women go for it, but the majority do. It has died down so much since I was younger, but I am still seeing and hearing teenage women becoming pregnant because boys pressure them into sex. I think that sex has become too damn important if you ask me. Porn and the media have forced and conditioned the next generation to feel like sex is all or nothing. This subject makes me so angry so I am sorry for the rant. I can't stand seeing someone "friend zoned" or stomped over because he isn't an asshole enough. I can't stand being criticized because I don't want to treat women like shit. When I was younger it upset me so bad I became suicidal just hearing about how shitty the world has become. Fuck that alpha male bullshit. Find someone who loves you and isn't some dumb stereotypical woman who cares more about looks and confidence then someone who actually loves them.
@giggleshmack No. I dont have any gf. Yes buddy I can do that stuffs for fun but I like to always avoid it because I have some beliefs which I like to stick to. @CTL + Alt + Del Yes buddy I have anger issues but I manage it very well. I have anxiety which I think is because of PMO. I dont think I have jealousy issue but i can see you point. I can easily be offended but I know its my fault so I dont take it seriously. @Limeaid Thanks for reassuring that women understands men and think in all the ways before acting. I just joined the goodreads and when I started search for romantic novels I find lot of novels with label ALPHA in it. I can't find a book that contain male point of view. In every group women are publicly saying that they want alpha like that, they want to be forced, they want enjoyed that book, they says that love is sometimes rough. prey started to love their pretetor is what disturbed me. And i stumble upon some article called "why I divorced my husband to find strong alpha male to run my life" in divorced mom website didnt help me. @No brainer. Thank you buddy. But the reality is they dont like man like that. I am pissed that why rude people get the good girls. They do everything so called alpha men or alpha women says eventhough they themselfs know that they are used by men and sidekick to women. I understand that this is a jungle and we are just sophisticated, self aware animals but its pisses me. @vanillajess why are you not in my workplace?. @chinese bro. I agree with you buddy. some men I know still sees woman as subservient to them and the women around them like them very much, i mean very very much. he is a biggest asshole i know in my life and he uses everyone and make fun of everyone but everyone loves him. I hate the labels, Real men, Alpha men, confidence men, dominant men, take charge men etcc.. I want a women who knows what she wants and who wants me and chose me. I dont want to change her or force her but the very charecter of alpha male potrayed in media is the man who uses people around him and change people around him according to his needs @Congrelous I can understand why women need take charge men in bed because they are wired that way. I can be pretty rough in my own way but I am not aggressive to get what i want, i want to give what she wants but the media and behaviour of women in some places made me to think that i am a beta for doing that. @Progressive Death Mettle. Yea buddy. it is what it is. This is a jungle with animals who are self aware emotional beings. You give what you take. I dont want to play the game but I understand that I cant get anything if dont play the game. I just hate the game and the opposite players. @NoBrainer Yes i have anxiety and anger issues. It doesnt affect anyone other than me. Since i am living with this for very long i can control it very well. I am thinking my anxiety will be reduced when I stop PMO and start feeding the happy wolf inside me. NoFap is helping alot to get my confusion and thought out of my system, its like reasoning with myself and keep reminding me about reality and truth.
