Who gave you permission to look at porn?

ssbackup · Jun 4, 2019

I was reading a book last week and it was discussing people doing things that are deviant. It said that if someone does something that is deviant, it is more than likely because someone they know gave them permission to do it - usually by example.

For me and Porn, one of my good friends growing up got his hands on a bunch of porn magazines from another friend. This wasn’t the first time I saw adult magazines growing up. The first time I felt like we were doing something wrong. The second time, it was like my friend looking at the magazines secretly in his room with friends gave everyone permission that it was ok to do. It was like the cool guy had the porn magazines and looking at porn became something that the cool guys did. Porn wasn’t discussed at all by adults so in the absence of someone saying otherwise, we all thought it was ok to do. This was the permission to look at porn for me. So I am consciously trying to tell myself, No you don’t have permission to look at porn.

randomname3 · Jun 5, 2019

I think it's the media that OKs it. Disney promote all these child actresses that go off to become hyper-sexualized sluts. Games are full of over-sexualized female characters to the point of numbness. Movies, series, and commercials are full of sexualized content. And most people who talk about it in a series or online actually say they think PMO is normal and healthy and ignore all the problems it causes. So, yeah the media.

ultrafabber · Jun 5, 2019

Very interesting topic!!!!!

Metaphorically speaking it was my older (3 year older) cousin and his father that "gave me permission". I knew sexy/nude stuff existed before but i instinctively knew it was wrong and weird to do it.

Then he received some Playboy mags from his father as a "gift" for him reaching adolescence. Looking back it's quite fucked because he was only 15 at that time (and i was 12). I started watching the women in that magazine next to others and tried to make it look like i'm not aroused and interested. Then i'd go to the bathroom to "read" more. They (my cousin and other friends of his age) all knew what was going on and made jokes about it. Nobody said "dude, don't do that".

Then my cousin got an XXX cd and he and his colleagues watched it (no weird stuff like masturbating but they all watched it and laughed or were amazed).

A few weeks or months later (i was still 12 or 13) i asked him to give me that XXX cd and he did, no questions asked. That's when i started spiraling out of control. Took me 20 years to stop the addiction.

At some point later on (probably age 17 or so) i actually had a moment of insight and thought - "wait, i don't think that masturbation and pornography is normal or healthy". So i googled this and all the sites told me "IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL AND HEALTHY, GO AT IT CHAMP". Not one site said the opposite (back then nofap didn't exist).

T-72 M4 · Jun 6, 2019

I remember that almost every peer watched porn/erotic movies in age of 16.
It was like one of the maturity's signs- look, I'm looking at porn. I'm not a child anymore.
It was a foolishness but Noone knew that porn might be harmful. There was no such studies, articles and YouTube videos (there wasn't YouTube at all when I was in secondary school, 2005). It was our mistake and some of us paid for it later, in real mature life.

I remember when some of my classmates bullied boys who were ashamed when asked about masturbation/ejaculation.
Then yes, my peers gave me right to watch porn.

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Who gave you permission to look at porn?

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