What The Hell Is This!? NEED HELP

Okay so let me explain I am currently in a long distance relationship and In about 8 month we will see each other, duo to the pandemic our time of meet was stalled.

Anyways, I notice things that didn't add up. Normally, I would masturbate to straight porn or any of the videos my girlfriend made for me.

But I could swear the way my dick gets erect is weirder than your usual case. I'm not really that effected by porn, as I normally don't get fully hard by watching it outside maybe Hentai or some hardcore sex, or a girl in presence of a big dick but thats probably because psychologically we are wired with competition and we associate measure with pleasure, I love getting ORAL from a girl, but normal stuff like lesbian porn or some women stripping and so on still mentally arouse me to start to masturbate to it and to achieve orgasm, it just doesn't give me an auto-erection to start with.

But I did get it from holding my GF hand, hug, small simple kiss, having her on my lap, the crave of touching tits, smacking her ass, all the affection things or more rough things, you know, that would let to sex, I would get an erection.

Sometimes just standing next to my GF outside I would have an erection and would leak precum in my pants.

But I always found it weird how my inner voice could speak of exotic situations like I'm calling my girl my slu't my whor' in my fantasy and that would start to get my dick to move and get prepared even if I was in bed by myself. Fantasy would get more dominant with her as it goes. Vocal inner voice of mine would speak of a sexual story and call her all sorts of nasty things, I think sex is nasty but the right kind of nasty, its hot.

Still sometimes I wonder if my dick gets turned on by my own self. I mean its my voice making a scene in my fantasy afterall.

Still things don't make sense also because sometimes I look at my girl over camera and I get all playful seeing her in her cute pajamas, that wear is my weakness, calling her my little chocolate girl and just watching her, focusing, deeply in the moment, I start to get my dick to move freely, no touch required and over camera, no actual porn fantasy messing my head, just straight craving, its hard to explain but it can't be controlled, thats all I know. I would consider that to be a healthy psychological and physiological response.

But my other auto-stimulators make me confused, like sometimes I would write sexual stuff to her and get erection also, but I would think text and vocal is still all my doing afterall.

The only auto-stimulus that is not mine is that experience over camera that I shared, I also notice that I need to get surprised sometimes, if I can see something coming my way my dick doesn't get excited nearly as much if at all.

Now I don't really consider myself a porn addict as much as a masturbation addict, I never went 4 days without PMO, when I come to day 4 it just gets too hard, and also 2 days ago I orgasm 3 times just to have a sexual lucid dream with a woman also on that same day afterwards waking up with a morning wood.

So my dick doesn't have physical problems but I can't don't get erections to strangers outside, its like if I don't have anything to do with you, I am kind of body dead, my dick just doesn't move, if I know I have something with you, my body comes to life and at that point I can't really control him and I don't even need to because well she is my GF.

Does any of this shit make sense even, I'm confused.