So my girl friend and I have been together for 6 months now. She wanted to wait to have sex and she has recently told me that she is ready. However, for that 6 months I have been trying to reboot and now feel motivated enough and strong enough mentally to do it. Unfortunately at this point I am still suffering from PIED so I do not think having sex right now would be the best idea. Any thoughts or tips on how I should talk to her about waiting a little bit longer to have sex? cheers
If you're close enough to be intimate, you're close enough to tell her everything that's going on... Intimacy isn't just about the physical, it just as much about the emotional connection so that means nothing to hide. That said if you don't think you, her or the relationship would last if you told her then you're not ready to be intimate imo. A-typical to the usual societal just hit it philosophy but you're in a place where we are striving to be better, connected men. I've no experience in this situation but who knows telling her may give her more respect for you and maybe even give you more strength as an accountability partner with a vested interest
Hey guys I've been going alright over the last 6 months. Struggled a bit here and there. Been seeing my psychologist to get tips on other ways to deal with my emotional stress. Over the last month I have been doing a lot better though. Im starting to believe in myself a lot more. She is unaware of my reboot at the moment. I have wanted to tell her, just haven't had the right moment. Im currently reading a book that has a few chapters on how to talk to your significant other about this type of thing. Peaceful Warrior I do agree that telling her could strengthen the relationship because being intimate is also about trust, respect, and honesty.
yes I am exclusive with her. We have also fooled around and I do not get as hard as I use to maybe 60%ish and it doesn't last that long at all. As well I was in a relationship a while ago that was solely based on sex and lets just say that it didn't work out so well.
PIED = Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction. The inability to "get hard" with a real woman after regular PMO for extended periods of time. DeeJay, have you done a 90 day reboot? If not, maybe you should go 90 days completely clean before you sleep with her. Be cautious when saying no though. Women aren't used to rejection like men are.
Hey giggleshmack. I have not yet done a 90 day reboot. I am currently in the process of working through one. I agree I will have to be cautious. I also been with a bit of an anxiety issue from past relationships so I could start off by talking to her about that and slowly work up to talking to her about my porn problems. However I won't do all of that in one day lol
Be honest with your gf if she doesn't know your rebooting or about your porn induced ED then tell her everything. I told my gf when we first started dating that I looked at porn and she appreciated me being honest and open about it. I've had some difficulty performing with her too. We've been together for 3 years now. If she truly loves you she will be supportive and understanding.
From experience I was upfront with my gf from the beginning and she's kind of my accountability partner.
