What do people do all day?

Hi Alyosha, I don't know what other people do, for me I read books, cook dinner, talk to friends, watch news on internet, exercise(play basketball, workouts, jogging), study a new language, play online chess. Sometimes hangout with friends.

 

Maybe consider getting a second job? Or maybe try lining up some interviews with places that offer more hours/higher pay? Working at a coffee shop you're probably energized from the free caffeine. That seems tailor-made for a third-shift occupation like security.

I'm only a part-time therapist's assistant but I usually have things to do, either with my man or my female friends. Best of luck, man!

 

I'm in the same boat as you, except that I don't have as many positive activities as you do. It may help to spend some of that 'wasted time' outside. Go to a park, or go on a walk, etc. Be purposeful with everything you do, especially in your leisure time. And like Noelle said, see if you can get another job and work more hours. Read some books too. They are much more fulfilling than tv and time on the internet. The Screwtape letters, by CS lewis is a great one, especially since you're a Christian, but mostly because it's a great book.

 

Maybe go to perpetual adoration and visit Christ? Attend a weekday Mass if possible and talk to your spiritual director, if you have one, about possible volunteer work.

 

You are blessed that you have a YA group, my diocese doesnt have one. I go once a week to the mens group and go to adoration once a week. I listen to the catholic answers podcasts on catholic.com. to help with my purity. matt fradd and jason evert have a few pod casts on that website on the topic of purity. i spend lots of time reading their blogs as well to help with developing the virtue of chastity. I also have been studying catholic apologetics too to occupy my mind instead of thinking of thoughts that will lead to pmo....i also take the time to go bike riding and swim and take cold showers...

 

Alyosha That is great that you are reading books and have read delivered by matt fradd ( I have too! He handed me the book after one of his talks). He, Jason evert, chris stefanick are always putting out new material all the time, friend them on twitter and fb so you have something to read or listen to when you have free time after work. catholic answers live is on 6-8pm est everyday through out the week, consider calling into the show or just listen to catholic perspectives of what is going on in the world and learn how to best convey the truth to others. It seems you are trying to discover your purpose, calling, vocation in life. I suggest asking a priest you look up to, to be your spiritual advisor. Often we need someone who is detached from our emotions to help us give direction in life, Pride is what keeps us from asking for help and guidance and tells us we can do things on our own. I'm sure you are praying for purity but also pray for deeper humility. "He will complete the good work he has begun in you " Phil 1:6

 

Sounds like a fulfilled life to me...

 

there are always things to do of course. the problem is, my problem for example, depression. like you said, no motivation leads to no action, it doesn't has to be high encouragement. just some feelings which i dont have. then i see no point of doing, or i just can't function to do it. some days i didn't eat, drink or sleep for about 30 hours, felt exhausted. yes you were right, it's pyschological.

 

From these posts, I would guess that you're a very spiritual person, and that your faith is important to you. I don't mean to try to sway you or a challenge your beliefs, only to offer this idea. It has helped me a lot with what seems like the empty space and empty time you have.

Every time you do something, focus on nothing else but that. When you're washing the dishes, examine each dish carefully, wash it with love, dry it with love, and place it gently in its proper place with love. When you go take your walks around the park, make them as slow as possible and try really hard to observe each leaf and each blade of grass. This practice has roots in Buddhist philosophy, but I think that its benefits are available to everyone. It's not easy to be totally focused in all the time but its worth the practice.

I personally have found that the more I observe, the more I appreciate. My time is filled not with PMO'ing, but with total awe and wonderment in the beauty of the world around us. Whoever or whatever created this place did a masterful job. It's our common playground, so you should try your best to enjoy it to the fullest. Every experience counts, and every experience matters. I hope this helps, and I hope this isn't too preachy.

Peace, friend.

 

Actually I'm in a similar situation. For me it begun when I was about 18 and it still deepens. I was always thinking that the others have some splendid way of spending their free time and my life is running through my fingers. It's partly true.

I very often ask different friends "what the hell are they doing in their free time" and to my surprise they usually answer that nothing or name some time-filling activities. In more ambitious case it is attending dance class, language courses, gym, voluntary or part time-job. In less ambitious cases (majority of people) there are completly time-wasting stuff like sleeping (during the day), watching some shit on the internet, playing online games, reading some fantasy book and first of all, drinking beers with friends.

I understood that there isn't ANY magical way of living pleasant life and almost EVERYONE have your problem. Your advantage is that you have finally understood that you are loosing your time and potential while the others spend their days non-productively and do it automatically without even thinking about it.

The solution for you is finding something that really turns you on. Preferably you would find the job that you really like and then you could do it with fun.

"Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life." Confucius

If it is so hard to find it just think what do you like to do and start doing it. Most important thing is to find your true passion. It may be photography, running, car tuning, bodybuilding or any other thing. Good luck to you!

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it." Steve Jobs

 

While on my way home from work, I concentrate on how gullible people are, how easily they are manipulated by superficial concepts like religion or a made-up excuse for war, how much I hate society (and my job), how I failed at helping others, even though I try every day.

Home, I concentrate on finishing the Karamazov Brothers, on my eradication of Parthians in my Ptolemaic Egypt campaign (Rome Total War) and I watch movies.
Sometimes, I note some ideas down for my soon-to-be graphic novel/fantasy book .
And I still manage to get time to relapse, now and again.

Hating myself with a vengeance, I begin anew.
Somehow, I notice that after the sadness of withdrawal, comes the anger and tension of accumulated testosterone.
Usually, that's about the time I break.

Rinse and repeat the process until you go insane.
This has been my experience so far.

 

Success to me in life would be the friendships/relationships that I have. That being said, I wish I had more friends and I'm spending more of my time trying to meet more people. It takes a lot of effort, but I think the payoff is good for my mental well-being. One way I do this is through a website called Meetup.com.
Does anyone else have ideas on how to meet more people?

 

I'd say, if you learn a new language, there are probably some language meetings near your area. Participating in a martial arts class is also a way to meet new people. Then there's volunteering, maybe you have a special field of interest, hm. What else? Barbecue, small house party (including friends of your friends),...
You could ask one of your friends to go out and have a drink or a talk, tell him to invite some of his friends, too, and as a consequence you'll get to know them as well.

Edit: How could I forget endurance sports/strength? Gym, running, cycling,... it shouldn't be hard to find some groups to share interests with.

 

Try reading a book about about anything that interests you, or take on a new hobby maybe take lessons in other styles of dance, learn to perform magic, or learn to play an instrument.

Whatever it is that you choose to do, continue doing it until its routine and then keep doing it until it becomes a habit.

BTW best of luck on your 90 day hard mode challenge!

 

I read and write on forums.
Preferably not NoFap, because it's an easy trigger when tired from school, but multiple other forums. I have one main forum where I probably spend at least an hour a day and often more, and have made lots of friends.

 

Hey man!

I'm going through the same thing. I'm a recovering addict from substances as well as this and one thing I've learned in recovery is motivation won't come to you. Once you make the first step it'll start getting easier to find the motivation. Once you've gotten that sense of accomplishment you'll feel good about yourself and continue staying motivated. I know it's easier said than done but it's one of those things you just have to do