I relapsed... I turned on the shower after a workout and sat on youtube while it was warming up. When i got tempted instead of getting up i watched P. But those 3 days... those were my best in a long time. I felt free, i am still going for 7 days. After that i will realize how great it and try 7 more days and so on. I know were not perfect but this ade me feel worse than other times.
I think the events you describe are very much like ones we have all had. If you feel discouraged after a fall (and we all do) be assured this is the devil's plan. His hope is that you become so discouraged that you give up and then, of course, you are his. However, you have several reasons not to be discouraged. First of all, you have recognized the need to avoid this sin - so many people don't even see it and these people are in real trouble. Secondly, the fact that you are being tempted in these ways is evidence that within you is the desire and capacity for goodness and purity. The devil only tempts the good, the rest are already his. Lastly, you have the courage to visit this site and honestly admit your mistakes. The first step to recovering from any addiction is to admit that the problem exists. You are on a good path and we are all here to walk the path with you but most gratifying, Jesus is walking the path with you too. Run to Him in prayer whenever you are tempted and don't stop praying for His help until the temptations abate. I assure you that in this way you will find freedom but don't be discouraged if it takes a little while. God teaches us at a pace we can manage.
