I’ve gone 1 month without anything trans related. Viewed soft YouTube joi porn once 3 weeks ago this made me feel low. I’ve had 2 MO’s in this month to healthy fantasy which released a bit. Recently I’ve been really stressed anxious and physically stiff. I can feel the cravings a bit so thought I’d reach out. Thanks
Just had awful family news, which has really shook me up. The need for wanting to escape is big. But I’ve come this far and know that stuff just degrades me and leaves me in a bigger hole. I need to be strong and keep pushing on. Remembering that it never for filled anything for me just destroyed my sense of self.
Be Strong brother You can do this. This man's success story will help u. It's little bit long but really inspiring.He is still active.U can get some advices from him.I donno u have already read this. https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/5-years-struggle-severe-hocd-transexual-porn.129195/
Ended up searching those transwoman escorts, well seeing what scraps I could get on my very adult secure phone. (After telling my friend / accountability partner to not give me the lap top he had of mine that I was calling for 10 minutes ago!) Managed to get a number and picture of a local one and went to the apartment. Got down to my pants and thought I’m going to regret this and what help is a woman with a penis going to do for my problems and traumas! So I said sorry my heads all over the place it’s not my thing I’m upset. I got dressed and left. It was a waste of money and she said come back later if I wanted to. I walked back to my car climbed in and said yes a victory I deleted the number and got some well needed sleep I have had that search engine blocked today. In the past I would have tortured myself saying: well you’ve opened the seal to that fetish you’re going to crave it for days till you’ve done the act “you’re powerless etc” you’ve messed up your stint searching and viewing those images. But I’ve found with the help of my amazing therapist being compassionate to myself, celebrating small victories and not living in shame takes a lot of its power away. So I’m classing it as a victory and my first month on a healthier journey away from that life.
Glad to hear that man. Small victories can leed u to the success as well as small streams make massive river. But next time try to avoid searching them bro.Hard but u can do it. If not some transgendered person will make a dam in ur river of success. BTW, don't u feel any masculine sound when they talking? When I watched trans porn ,my bro go down when I hear their voice.
It is great that you walked away but it is troubling that you went as far as going to the apartment. Think of the steps you took before hand to get there. Otherwise you may not have the strength to walk away next time.