Yo, got 120 days Hard mode. And im getting sloppy as now the urgancy and pain of my last relaps is not in my head.. Im posting here to bust myself on my powerless-ness to stop looking at bikini babes, youtube hoochies, etc. I know these lust hits feed my addictian and its a miracle that i have not fapped to it. So over past several months a few times a week i would spend 30min-hour looking at that junk, usually when tired at night. My blocker on my phone turns off at 10pm all internet, and aps for facebook, youtube, and instagram.. but at around 9:30pm the urge would hit and i would look at lust babes knowing it would end at 10pm.. my home computer blocker had the same 10pm cut off time too. But its letting me stay on till 11pm. I think the time change has it messed up so its off an hour.. In anycase I know its a slippery slope and will lead to fapping. It always has in the past. I think my flatline got me this far, but now my libido is returning and soon as i have a full reboot i want to start dating afain. I know i want to date a healthy girl. And if i keep looking at hoochie gals that just use sex and lust to hook men thats what i will be after. So I need to take my recovery deeper and stop this habit too. Its like an alcaholic taking sips a few times a week. It tends to only happen at night when im done with work and just wanting to chill and relax b4 i go to bed... So i had my accountability partner change the setting on instagram to turn off at 8pm now.. he can do that remotly from his own phone.. but my desk top id need to meet in person to change time setting on that. I guess its worth the hastle to do that.. In anycase just posting to keep it real, get honest, point out my week spot, and seek help to plug this leak and take my reboot to a deeper level b4 it leads to a full on relapse. Thanks for all your help guys. I would of not made it this far without nofap.com and this communities support!
Good on you! Question, the person who can help you change settings on desktop, can they remote in to change the settings? Could get it done sooner.
Yo. Need to keep it real.. did not look at any porn-subs for a week after a posted on here about it and shared about the issue at a SLAA meeting.. it really helped.. then Sunday night i looked at a bit.. then last night i looked at the edg of the edg on instagram. It was short 10second to 15 second clips from porn movies, but just girls faces as they are getting sex and their moans.. i looked at about 5 clips. You could tell it was real. At the time i thought not porn as no body parts shown so R rated.. no nudity of bodies except maybe a person's back.. then i clicked a link and found real porn clips on there with genitalia.. i tried to scan through the page and find one that showed no body parts to keep it R rated.. but it was too much so i quickly turned it off and took a shower then went to a Sex and Love Adidicts Anonymouse meeting and called a bro and busted myself on situation as i drove there.. i felt super triggered rest of the night and feel a hangover today.. i did not touch myslef, but feel keyed up and triggered.. I know i need to block instagram completely but dont want to.. i guess i will make a commitment right here and now that if i do any scanning or serches on inatagram for hoochie girls and bikini babes i will block the ap. I am allowed to look at my feed.. as i have no hoochie girls on there.. i do have a few friends that i actually know that are attractive women that post some attractive pics time to time.. but i guess thats life.. but no seaches or i block ap. Thats my agreement to me and you. Thanks for being here and any support.
