My story is the classic: parents divorced at young age, introduced to P by older boys, M came naturally after that, turbulent teenage years set the stage for me become a PMO addict and now this plague almost cost me my marriage. I know many people stuck in the same rut and while I've been their accountability partner, yet I've secretly waged my own war or minimized my problem. I've won a few battles, but the campaign has been a stalemate until now. I went for 18 days with out the help of this site, reading everyone else's blogs for encouragement for strength in the next battle. But, I lost again and determined I had to be fully plugged in to this network for true accountability. I suffer from PIED, but after 11 and then 18 days of no PMO, I was almost fully sexually functional with my wife, and ecstatic because it had been so long...years...since I truly enjoyed sex besides PMO. Then, as others here have testified, I got cocky, and while things were getting so much better, I relapsed. I'm looking forward to being supported and being supportive...Let's Do This!
Hi Once&4ALL. Welcome to the forums! I hope you find the strength to conquer your addiction. Always keep the end goal in sight and never give up! Good luck. Jimb0
You can do it bro. You already have the right attitude. You was also able to briefly identify how PMO came into your life, which is really important, because knowing how it happened and why you do it will add to this healing processing. It will help to cancel this thing out of your life once and for all. You're doing this for yourself, which is the most important thing, but whenever you get tempted to go back to PMO, always think about your wife and how this can ultimately effect her too. She loves you and she's your biggest fan. Bear her in mind as well. PMO is sucking the life out of men. Lets identify it and finally nip it in the bud. I believe in you.
Hey Once&4ALL, Being sexually functional with your wife sounds like a great source of motivation. Definitely use that leverage. It sounds like you have the right attitude. Good luck.
Hey once4all What happend? You seem like a good guy, did you just forget to update or did you fuck me over by giving up? I hope you didn't do that. i'll be here, jump on the train and let's ride out of this shithole together edit: lol this isnt a journal i realise, still above applies. should create one man
Thanks to everyone for their support. I guess I forgot about this journal, but have been PM a couple of guys almost daily in lieu of that. I am actually doing ok, after a couple of resets - won't get cocky or lackadaisical again. Since the last reset I have: 1)maintained accountability with someone here that has been very beneficial for both of us I believe 2)have an appointment to also set up accountability with a local close friend fighting the same PMO battle (that we've already confided with each other in) to see if I can help him do better, and so we can lock each other out of filters/setups (a fellow IT guy) 3)Have initiated and maintained a 1.5 to 2 hr work out schedule 6 days a week - seeing results there all ready over the past month, killer since I went to 6 days/week 4)restarted a daily Bible devotion to help keep me focused in my faith 5)Am getting 8hrs of sleep versus night owl no-man's land in the PMO fight 6)I am in a firm flatline and totally ok with that 7)Have a new found focus from my wife to combat that problem which hasn't existed in years This site is the best. I try to encourage those that are new because I feel VERY blessed to have found you guys, the support and the accountability. I appreciate being called out for not continuing this. Thanks, again!
Life is good. I have been on the site every day, reading to relate to my situation, and encouraging newbies. My goal is only 7 days away and I will be stoked to cross that boundary - can't remember if I ever have since I started PMOing around 11yrs old. I said 18 days was my longest streak at the start of this thread. Not sure if it was 16 or 18, but I do know it has been a fight steadily. I'll leave it at 16 days, and then go to 30 days from there. I'm adding muscle mass from being in the gym almost daily, my depression has all but disappeared, and I have my positive, happy attitude back. In fact, I received a promotion at work that would have been too challenging if I was not in a different, better place now. I give God the credit for everything - without faith I don't know how I would have achieved so much and changed the direction I was headed. Thank you guys for all of your support - it is a huge motivation as well. I have noticed that many newbies don't get responses right away. I feel that we all need to do better at that because it looks like some fall off and never come back when they don't get a response. They are getting "left behind" while our team marches forward. I appreciated being called out for not keeping this blog up - it reminded me of the commitment we have to each other - iron sharpens iron. Let's make sure we help folks get in the door so they can have a better chance at freedom from PMO. Have a terrific day!
Another great day in flatline mode. No harm, no foul today. Working toward Day 16. BTW, staying busy is the best defense I've found. Exercise, socializing and family time make that easy and each have perks of their own. Let's win this fight fellas!
It's been a great day back at work, but very intense and draining. I'm checking in, have read a few posts and am heading to bed. Hope you all are doing well...keep the good fight moving forward!
Once&4all, I read through your posts and I am encouraged you are staying on track. I know for me I have really been trying to focus on things that help renew my mind. It is so easy to go off towards a very dark place with my thoughts and I have to consciously counter that with something powerful and positive. I have been focusing on Rm 12:2 "...but be transformed by the renewing of your mind". Keep strong and keep free.
Thanks for reading and sharing Fellas! Doing well in flatline mode, though some morning wood has returned - better than it has been in a long time! I have been able to overcome PIED in the last two sexual encounters with my wife. No O there yet for me, but it is amazingly motivational to perform better than I have in months. Also, the chaser effect has been VERY strong - guarding against it! I am determined, now more than ever. Only a few days to surpass my longest streak. Have been a little tired the last two days, so I skipped the workouts. Going back to work after vacation has been very draining because we have a high operations tempo right now - business is good! Charging forward, running the race that is set before me. I wish you all great strength for you battles this week. God Bless!
My Faith in God has been integral to my progress, even more so when I was deeply depressed over this addiction. I recommend the following songs, on YouTube preferably, for the visuals with lyrics. It is very encouraging to have quiet time with these songs to watch, listen and reflect how each song intersects with our life. Look for the songs with lyrics, and preferably lyrics with pictures. You'll see the highest view counts or the ones that are the "official" versions. I've made a playlist on Youtube so I can go back and watch or listen to all the songs whenever I want. I hope this helps you where you are.
Keep it up man! I'm a newbie and you commented on my story and I really appreciate your support! It's time I return the favor. I'm here to tell you that I'm rooting for you bro! Keep going!
Four more days to meet my longest streak..counting down, hanging extra tough. I want to make it to Day 17 and beyond! Life is good, busy at work, tired after the gym and dinner. Have a great, strong day All!
Thanks Dude! You are quite welcome...it's cool too see how contagious encouragement can be. I will be watching posts to. Here's my advice for you to get in the fight against PMO the easiest and most effective way below. IF you do these things and get fully educated, it goes a log way to fighting the urges and building a great streak. 1. Share your story (how it started and where you are now with PMO)by starting a journal on the Forum 2. Set up a porn blocker on your computer 3. Get yourself an accountability partner on this site, and locally if you have a close friend you can safely confide in 4. Visit www.yourbrainonporn.com to understand the science of the addiction so you can battle it with wisdom. 5. Watch The Tedtalk here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU 6. Read posts here daily and update your journal - you'll understand others' experiences and how they may relate to you 7. Set realistic goals and add a counter to help you and everyone see your progress. 8. Ask questions along the way - we're here to help! Get back up, shake yourself off and let's march on PMO to take our lives back!
Fellas, forgot to update this but keeping tight with APs. Doing well...24hrs to go to beat longest streak! Stay strong Bros!
