Time to break a destructive habit

Hi. I have been addicted to porn for a very long time. Before the Internet (yes, there was a time before the Internet!) I used to buy regular supplies of top shelf magazines from soft porn to hard extreme stuff. I used to masturbate at least once a day regardless of whether or not I was in a relationship at the time. In fact, I sometimes masturbated more when I was in an active relationship!

With the advent of the Internet and, in particular, unlimited downloads I was in wankers heaven!!

I'm married, but I haven't had sex with my wife for 3 years (till this week at least). However, I watch porn and masturbate to climax around 3 times a day!! It's actually so bad that I have damaged my foreskin to the extent that it no longer retracts (phimosis) and yet I continue to masturbate even when I've damaged the skin!

I know I am seriously addicted and I have tried to stop, but I always manage to give myself some excuse or reason to just "have another go". I tried to make love to my wife this week, but found that I couldn't feel anything and so couldn't satisfy her or myself. Now I just feel like an absolute failure.

I have been depressed about this and want it to stop so I've come here to hopefully get the support and incentive to stop this terrible habit before it damages me more or completely ruins my relationship with my wife.

 

Thank you, Limeaid. I'm 3 days in and while I'm not PMO free I've only masturbated once instead of my usual 9 times in that time period! I guess I have a better understanding of how an alcoholic feels now. In fact, I'm an ex-smoker who struggled to quit for many years, but have now been smoke free for 8 months. It's been tough, but I feel confident that I can stay off the cigs this time. I hope I have the will power to do the same with PMO. I really want to quit!