This is a test.

I wake up and feel good, my mind just able to focus on something I appreciate. It’s only a matter of time before I am tested to see if I crumble. Looking around everyone is just more temptation. The game is on and I feel motivated to play. When we release we take ourselves out, put ourselves on the shelf.

Id rather be able to feel everything in life than feel completely numb to it. We want to be numb because we feel too weak to be strong. We worry and we decide it’s better for us to just hide away. I cant stand it anymore, can’t stand being upset over all of it.

You have to take charge and want nothing more than to change. You need to rather drop dead today than to live the rest of your life afraid. Releasing only pushes you back in time, suffocating you and leaving you gasping for air. Life is not meaningless, it does matter, if you think it doesn’t then just give up.

If there is no reason to do anything you won’t fucking do it. If you think porn is no big deal, it won’t be in your head and you will just suffer the more you live. Suffer for no reason, just a miserable shame rotting away. You need these lessons to take root and want to steer others away.

If we don’t, if we just let this continue, it will only get worse. We are gonna have a generation of people who spit all over the beauty in life. Who gives a shit about saving anything when we make it so ugly. We have been given so much in life, yet we are far too ignorant to see it. I’m done with that my brothers, done making a fool of myself everyday. Feeling like a pathetic loser because I can’t keep my hands off myself.