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The sexual conditioning and desensitisation is devastating.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by skaterdrew, Aug 15, 2019.

  1. Aug 15, 2019 #1
    skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    The sexual conditioning and desensitisation is by far the most difficult thing to heal. After being on this journey for a year and a half with a lot of streaks and a lot of relapses, what I can tell is my mental health has significantly improved. But the sexual conditioning and desensitisation just seems extremely difficult to fix.

    This in my opinion is why PMO is not like other drugs or addictions. The withdrawal from drugs like heroin, cocaine, alcohol can be much worse than PMO initially, but then after the person has been off these substances for a few weeks or months they're through the withdrawal, and for the most part their life has transformed. But with PMO even if your off it completely for a few weeks or months the sexual conditioning and desensitisation is still there. It honestly must be one of the most difficult things to fix.

    How does the sexual conditioning and desensitisation happen? One theory is how much sexual experience you've had, especially in your adolescent years, and how much you have PMOed. If you've had little or no sexual experience but you've PMOed for years then this is a sure cause for sexual conditioning and desensitisation. But in my opinion the biggest thing that causes the sexual conditioning and desensitisation is the way you PMO. So some guys for the most part have always used PMO in a way where they masturbate to it for like 5 minutes before they ejaculate, and they don't use it again for a few days, week or weeks. Where as some guys like me binge on PMO, masturbating and edging to it, flicking about hundreds of different content for hours before they ejaculate, and they do this everyday or nearly everyday, and have done this for years. This binging in my opinion is most likely the biggest cause of the sexual conditioning and sexual dysfunction.

    Something I know a lot of guys on this don't like hearing is there is actually a lot of guys in the world who masturbate to porn and are still able to have sex. I mean I know a lot of guys who have girlfriends, wives, get laid regularly, and they still masturbate to porn. In my opinion the reason for this is these guys probably don't binge on it, or have hardly every binged on it. They probably just used porn as a quick sexual release and this is how they have always used it.
     
    skaterdrew, Aug 15, 2019
    skaterdrew, Aug 15, 2019
    #1
    e123 and Feelslikezoom23 like this.
  2. Aug 15, 2019 #2
    Deleted Account

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    Everyone is different. I'm one of those guys who was still able to have real sex whilst being severely addicted to pmo but rest assured I used a lot of porn in terms of frequency, at least 3 times a week I'd say and I edged really bad to it, sometimes for up to 3 hours before climaxing. Most of this desensitization process and conditioning has to do with something called the Coolidge effect. Everything about porn, the addictive aspect, is driven by novelty. Novelty really is the key word when it comes to porn addiction. It is constantly 'in with the new, out with the old' and part of the brain won't really care what fetish it gets hooked on as long as the orgasms get bigger and better. Guys just get bored with seeing normal women have sex pretty quickly and it doesn't take to long to go from normal porn to things like transwoman porn, cartoons and what have you because of the novelty involved. Novelty means more dopamine, more excitement and overcoming tolerance to more of the same old genre. Porn can get boring over time. This tolerance capability means addictive processes really are at play.
     
    Deleted Account, Aug 15, 2019
    Deleted Account, Aug 15, 2019
    #2
  3. Aug 15, 2019 #3
    Gaius6Reboot31

    Gaius6Reboot31 Fapstronaut

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    I am trying to come out of the same pit. Much more porn than real sex, severe addiction and I can remember the days when dancing close to a female would tun me on. They are now long gone.

    There are also guys who binge-drink without becoming alcoholics. Addiction is path-dependent. There may be genetic predispositions, though. For instance addicts' brains show larger amounts of a specific transcript factor in the nucleus accumbens. This is likely accumulated through years of use in a way that changes your sensitivity to dopamine. It is reasonable to think that not everybody is born with the same propensity to build up that specific transcript factor. But even when born with a tendency for it, we made the changes in our brain through use ourselves.
     
    Gaius6Reboot31, Aug 15, 2019
    Gaius6Reboot31, Aug 15, 2019
    #3
  4. Aug 16, 2019 #4
    Chappie77

    Chappie77 Fapstronaut

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    In some ways I want to be like this.
    I have a PIED called delayed ejaculation. Masturbation practices I did all my life means that I don't get stimulated enough by vaginal intercourse to orgasm. Another component of that is masturbating to things that I could never realistically obtain in real life.
    after many awkward and embarrassing failures at sex and relationships I resigned myself to exclusively using PMO as my "sex life".
    With this resignation came porn hoarding and edging behaviors that took me away further from any semblance of "normality".
     
    Chappie77, Aug 16, 2019
    Chappie77, Aug 16, 2019
    #4

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