I have observed that during the process of relapsing, there is a part of me thinking I can't be doing this, now I think of all the negative consequences of the relapse, BUT the dopamine rush I'm experiencing at the moment seems to be more important than the negative consequences I'll face later It's really fucked up
Welcome to addiction. Most addictions are fed by the short-term rush of dopamine without thinking of the long-term consequences, and yes it's F'ed up. Until you understand how negative the consequences are, it's very hard to change. The best thing is to walk away from the porn before you look at it. Turn off your phone or computer and go live real life. Do anything else besides MO to digital porn. It all seems stupid when you think of it that way.
@Micheal65 Have it ever crossed your mind while jerking off to porn that there might be people (especially women) in those videos you watch, who perform in them against there own will or because they have to, to be able to survive? This thought have hit me many times and that is also a big reason why I decided to quit, because I don't want to promote that kind of content. I don't want to make myself satisfied, while some people on my screen who perform in them pay a high price. I will never go back to that hell! When I think of what I have been doing during a 5 year period I immediately feel dirty and disrespectful.
This is the mechanics of the addiction. You only remember the reward that you can get in an instant and forget about to long term consequences as well as benefits of remaining sober. This is something we all have to battle and we need help from each other to avoid getting tricked by that voice of addiction that tries to make us relapse. This is a great reminder. For me personally though, it only works when i have some degree of sobriety. When i am in the PMO binge swamp, my empathy is numbed so i don't care, i just want my drug. =(
@A8X it's very unfortunate that the addiction of yours has made you lost lack of sense. Because deep inside you, I know you see it this way but because of your brain and it's addiction to PMO, it's able to eliminate common sense from your mind, because all it's carving for is the high dopamine dose it realeses by PMOing.
