Twenty days is a good reward intrinsically/on itself and every other following day has bigger reward to come why look for outside reward? Did you know that in studies on children who were helping others for goodness sake they were happy and they motivation kept high whereas those who received material rewards for their help were not that happy and their motivation went down together with the reward?
Day 12 - got a workout in this morning which is always good for my mood throughout the day. Stay strong friends! One day at a time.
Day 16! Yestarday I had a lot of anxiety all day, maybe for 3 facts: I didn't do exercise, I do 6 times at week and yestarday was my rest day I didn't take a shower with cold water I didn't sleep well in my weekend In the entire day I suffer of anxiety, I didn't do so much of work and I took some relax pills for sleeping. Something interesting is that after I took the pills I felt really good, the anxiety dissapear. Today I did exercise and took a shower with cold water and slept well. Today the anxiety is gone.
586 days 4 day Post vasectomy going good all life activities normal but avoiding yoga poses that require a lot of contortion.
Pill is good but it is even better to find out the cause of the anxiety and deal with it. This way it will be a cure instead of the temporary relief( which is good toobut the thing is the more you use temporary relief aid the less effective it becomes and even can cause a dependency...)
Could you walk me through why you got a vasectomy, and has it changed you in any way other than the physical?
Day 0 - Nazgûl It seems like every time I go on YouTube in the evening, I PMO soon after. I think I need to quit YouTube for now if not permanently, as it leads to nothing good. There are some economics videos I like to watch, but if I do that, that is all I can do. I need to avoid binging as a pornography addiction is basically a dopamine addiction and a hit from YouTube is similar to a hit from PMO, though it may be in lower doses. So no YouTube (unless it is early in the day and no binging). I am feeling a little depressed as I finish my classes this semester and wrap up work for a month. I met this really nice woman from India and a couple months ago, she actually gave me her number without me asking. I don't know if something will come out of this, but we have plans to hang out over break. Best, Mathman1994
Good observation brother ! I would recommend you to stop watching movies, altogether if you can, for our brain is like monkey's and we never just watching but picking-learning up patterned-examples of behavior to follow in the same or similar situation, often violent, crazy-against common sense and downright self as well as others harming. Can you think of how our governments care for us if they indulge themselves and allow us to get our minds programmed with lust, killings, hate, violence etc.either out of their ignorance of the evil they allow to thrive or out of some evil plan they have in regards of the current overpopulation of the earth as some kind of indirectly encouraged(by their allowing or negligence to see it for what it really is and take appropriate action against it in alignment with their duty to take care of the well-being of their votees) course of self destruction.
that´s a terrible idea bro. it´s too soon to start dating, you need to focus on gaining reboot capital first. i will do a post next about that. stay tuned
Checking in Fellowship!! i´m feeling somewhat good but a little jumpy because of work stress, lot´s of emotions, lot´s of events today, but i´m hanging the best i can. urges are starting to rise, and i felt a little hesitant when i was home alone today for lunch. but i keep doing my thing, and get out of the house when the time came Nothing more to add brothers. Here´s an important newsletter from JK Emezi about dating. Have a great day Brotherhood, checking out "5 Tips For Dating During Your Reboot Hey Brother! At some point during the reboot process, single brothers in the Porn Reboot program are going to begin dating. Some methods for overcoming porn addiction have you holding your seed and abstaining from intimacy for long periods. I disagree with that, though. I believe that having an outlet for your romantic and intimate needs is a very normal, healthy progression. It’s not good for you to hold yourself back from intimacy or connection with the women around you. That’s a one-way ticket to sexual repression which is another serious problem. Learning to date in a healthy way during your reboot is a vital part of the process. You need to begin working on building relationships with women in a positive way. Now if you’re a single man who’s been focused strictly on his reboot for months, getting into the dating game probably makes you feel a bit nervous. Dating in today’s world does come with its challenges and you might find yourself in a tough situation. If you’re early in your reboot, you might have no idea how to have a normal conversation with the opposite sex. Don’t worry, no matter how extreme your out-of-control behavior is, you’re never too far gone. You can rebuild an amazing and active sex and dating life regardless of how far your behavior progressed. It will take some work but that’s what the Porn Reboot system is here to do. So, how can you get back to dating during your reboot? 1. Figure out whether you’re ready to date In my experience, I recommend that a man has his behavior under control for at least 6 to 12 months before beginning to date. During that time you should be actively working on bettering yourself, not just using willpower to keep your behavior at bay. You should have different areas of your reboot capital built up, should be aware of your triggers, and should have strong boundaries in place. These are things that take a few months to set up, not a few weeks. If these things aren’t in place, you aren’t ready to date. 2. Put together a dating plan Once you decide that you’re ready to date, you should approach dating like you do other major life changes during your reboot: with a plan. Of course, different men’s plans will vary according to their lifestyle and what they want. But having a plan in place for your particular situation, lifestyle, and wants will help you out. Where will you find your potential dates? How often should you see them before having sex? What will you do to reflect on your dates and determine whether this person is someone you actually want to continue seeing? And who will be your accountability partner or partners during the dating process? 3. Date without expectations Building up expectations for your dates puts you on the fast track to disappointment and letdown. That’s not to say every date you go on will be miserable, but it’s also a reminder that not every date will be something you’re interested in. Keeping a hold of your emotional balance is critical and dating without expectations is an important way to do that. Take time to get to know the women you’re dating. Having sex with women you aren’t in a committed relationship with will always put your reboot at risk. Slow things down and take the weeks or months needed to determine whether this woman is someone you’re actually interested in. 4. The dating process is not about sex, nor strictly about finding a partner I know this might sound counterintuitive but trust me on this one. Early in your reboot, the main point of dating is to go out and literally practice meeting people. If you’ve struggled with porn addiction and compulsive sexual behavior for years, you’re going to need that practice. Go out and have a good time with some different women. Observe how you react emotionally during the process. Be honest with yourself when reflecting on the experience after you get home. You might even find out that you’re not quite ready for dating yet. You’re simply on a fact-finding mission at this point. 5. Have some standards In the past, you probably would have slept with anyone who gave you the time of day. You weren’t very concerned about the types of women you were with, you only cared about whether you could score at the end of the night. Now that you’re rebooting, though, it’s a different story. Today you need to have standards, brother. Once you drop your focus on sex, you begin to notice how uninteresting many of the women you saw before were. You’re much less interested in interacting with toxic women. You can begin to determine how you’d like to be treated and find a woman who meets those needs. Get Some Support Along the Way One of the most important things to keep in mind is you shouldn’t head into dating alone. Trying to manage your dating life during your reboot without any support is a disaster waiting to happen. Get yourself in the middle of a group of men, like we have in the Porn Reboot Facebook group, who know exactly what you’re going through. The more you surround yourself with support, the better your experience will be. You’ll have men who you can talk to when you’re having a difficult time with dating or you feel like you’re at risk of slipping. Dating during your reboot doesn’t have to be an impossible feat, brother. It’s a natural part of life and you can do it with the right support and approach! Your brother in this struggle, J. K. Emezi"
I am so sorry fellowship but I slipped yesterday. I started fishing again and "accidentally" saw some P and then I did the bad choice of going full PMO mode. I've spent some time thinking today on how to modify my reboot strategy. One immediate modification was to remove Twitter, as that is the app I've been using to fish. Henceforth, I will note use Twitter. Moreover, I will for the second time try to have a check list of daily "tasks" I should follow everyday. 1. Stay accountable. 2. Physical exercise. 3. Qigong or meditation. 4. Eating in moderation. 5. Study about the reboot.
Let bygones be bygones, remember who you are and the only real time is present. Always stay true to who you really are and the endless chain of present moments will bring you honor and success in your ways.
Hobbit again - thanks be to God! Low day today - procrastinated / not productive at all - bed late last night - bad habit - back to bed on time tonight and getting up early & getting things done - but at the same time I am making sure that I do not get accelerated/ agitated It is all about managing the low energy at the moment - I will need to look at what to do when the energy comes back end of next week - will list ways to channel it then
Day 11 Another tiring day, I’m looking forward to January when the church calendar calms down somewhat! Spoke to a friend and colleague of mine who was sharing to one of his friends what it means to model a Christian relationship, so often these days we settle for what is easy and quick, when a healthy relationship requires self-sacrifice and strength. I was encouraged by his words and it kept me resolute to the journey we are all facing in fighting PMO.