To put this in context, I'm studying a post-grad certificate which basically involves doing a second job within my actual job, essays etc. I work 30 hours a week, I have a toddler and another due this year. In short, life is hectic. In the early days of the course the stress fuelled my addiction because old habits when I was at school and as a student meant that I would procrastinate, not get stuff done, and then try to destress with porn. I was always the student putting his finishing touches on the essay early in the morning it was due. The earliest I got an essay in was 2 hours before the deadline. But on Thursday, I managed to push through and get one in a whole 11 days early. The dopamine rush lasted the whole of Friday. I'm still kinda high from that sense of achievement. It's FAR BETTER than porn ever was. It didn't happen by accident. It took a lot of working out how I study best in the time I have in the evenings - what works for me and what doesn't. It took learning the lesson that it just needs to be good enough to pass, and the law of diminishing returns. But in the end, I realise just how awful porn was. Porn felt easier than the work. But I realise now that porn was harder, in many ways. Clearing my head of that junk has given me space to work productively and fruitfully. Using porn atually made my studying way harder than it needed to be. I'm now looking forward to working toward other pieces of work and getting them done in a timely fashion. Don't use porn to hide from your studies. Do the difficult thing, do the study, do the work, enjoy the hard-earned fruit of your labour. It's far more satisfying.
