Stop trying to intellectualize everything - dating

What I have learned after so many years of approaching women, working on myself, trying to understand relationships is: there are no answers.

I used to try to understand everything, to intellectualize everything. Thinking that some things work better than others. That I would be happier. But the truth is, it all came out of my head. And I was too proud to admit that what I think is the truth is not reality.

How to approach this woman, what to say, how to behave. Even sleeping with women, I thought that would make me a cool person. it never did.

I realized, as I went along, that I don't know anything, and that's fine. And that trying to understand everything is useless, simply because reality is far too vast, doesn't care about your brain, and is always changing.

Watching videos, conferences, reading books is useless.
I thought I had a problem. I tried many different things, especially when approaching women.
But the hard truth is: I didn't fully accept myself. And when you don't accept yourself, you're going to believe the first sentence out of a book that sounds good. and hang on to what you can.

Dating is not about trying to figure it all out. On the contrary, it's about becoming more human. And accepting that you are imperfect. It's okay to be lousy at approaching this girl, to not know what to say. It's okay not to be perfect. Just enjoying the moment and living your life.

And it's a liberating feeling to tell yourself that. Finally you can live, and talk to women not in terms of strategies, because you read that somewhere or a coach told you that was the best way to do it. But simply by being you. With your strengths and your imperfections. By fully accepting yourself.
What if you took action, not to have a relationship (to fill a void in you, yes I know, I've been there), but purely out of humanity. Because finally you start to take yourself into consideration.

You already have everything within you. No one will come to your bedside on the last day of your life and say "man, you've slept with 100 women, it's amazing".

Fuck the process. Live your life. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Not even yourself. There is no answer. No, if you had done or said something different, it wouldn't have made any difference. You don't have to beat yourself up for never being enough.

It's much easier for me to talk to women now than 2 years ago. Because I if she rejects me, she rejects who I am deep down.
I will never feel bad about being me

 

I love this, and I think it's such an important message. Thank you!

 

Acceptance is far more liberating than change. Change is too much often fueled by frustration, or this feeling of never being enough.
I tried both. And I prefer this path

 

My problem is, i think every women is cheap and will be available for me. I recently stalked a married women thinking she will be available to me for some affairs. But it won't go as i planned. She call the police and i ran away in my moped just like we see in movies lol. (I still wonder why didn't they noticre my vehicle number). I was stalking her for 50+ days. But i am too afraid to talk to her. I think if i talk to her, then maybe she will show a positive sign ( may be, who knows) but instead i stalked her like a Prevert. I am million miles away from reality. Whats your opinion about my deed here, i would like to know that.? Thank you