I'm not a furry, I don't want anything to do with the subculture but I have a fetish for furries and fantasise about furry porn when I masturbate. There's nothing pleasurable about any of it, it feels involuntary and is sometimes painful, it feels unnatural because I know what I'm attracted to and what I enjoy. Normally, I'm attracted to other (human) men and I don't need to think about furries to become aroused. I don't feel like my relationship with my husband lacks anything and I'm so happy with him yet I still have this fetish looming over me and I hate it because it causes me suffering and I don't want it to put my happiness in jeopardy. I've been losing sleep because it's more of a problem at night, so it's having an effect on my health.