Sex cam addiction

I was in a similar situation as you where I fell into the cam show addiction pretty bad. Over the course of 2 years, when I was my worst, I spent close to $10,000. The girls in those shows sure know how to manipulate you so you feel like they really like you and are interested in you and that keeps you going back. I like to say at that time the head on my shoulders was not the one making the decisions, the head between my legs was in control.

A few things I did that helped me to conquer my cam addiction:
1. I wrote a big 10,000 on post it notes and taped it to my computer so there was a reminder of the money i spent. Seeing it there on my computer was the first reminder to not do a cam show and usually the shock that I needed to not go into cam shows.
2. Anytime i thought about going to a cam show I would think "what else is a better way to spend this money?" Using my rational brain to figure out better ways to spend that money would get my mind off of the cam shows.
3. I changed the e-mail on my account to some fake e-mail address that I would never remember.
4. I change the password to some sort of random password that I would never remember.
5. I then clicked the "forgot password" link on the cam website in hopes it would send an e-mail to the fake one and when it bounced back as undeliverable they would delete the account. Maybe wishful thinking on my part but figured it could not hurt to try.

I fully admit steps 3-5 are easily passable by just creating another account but I considered it part of my recovery to not do that and if I caught myself doing it I was able to stop.

The final thing that helped me conquer my addiction, and I certainly do not recommend this, is that someone hit my car and totaled it. Most important thing was that everyone was okay but I had to buy a new car. So any funds that would have been cam show money were now being used to making car payments. Even after paying the car off early, I had gone long enough with cam shows that they no longer interest me.

 

Hey man. Welcome to the community. You're definitely not alone. There's a whole pack of us that share this type of addiction. I was in the same boat as you but eventually progressed to illicit massage and escorts...while still camming. Like you, porn is essentially a non issue as I got sick of that years ago...does essentially nothing for me.

That being said, this community is filled with hope...you just gotta dig around for it. I've been a member for 5+ years and was never able to put together more than a week or two of sobriety....until now. The primary difference this time is my consistency in taking action. I do a few very simple things each and every day and I've managed almost 90 days sobriety thus far. Here's a list of a few things I do everyday regardless of how good or bad I'm feeling:

1. Update my NoFap journal two times a day minimum.

I highly recommend starting a journal in the 'Reboot Log' section. It's a great way to hold yourself accountable while updating the community on your struggles and successes.

2. Direct messaging with accountability partners and like-minded members.

The more time I spend in the community, the more likely I come across those who struggle with similar addictions. We message each other via direct message here on this site. It's a fantastic way to be accountable and also discuss things you may not want to put in the public forums.

3. Poking around the forums and replying to others where I feel I can add value.

This is an important one for me simply because I become familiar with others and sometimes offer up my experiences on a specific topic. In addition, it keeps me in the community longer which keeps recovery in the forefront of my brain...which I absolutely must have.

4. Responding and welcoming new comers.

This is something that has definitely enhanced my recovery this time. I spend a lot of time in the 'New to NoFap' forum welcoming new comers. I think it's paramount to make new members feel welcomed because some of us come here completely broken and helpless. Unfortunately, I don't see enough old timers engaging in this particular forum.

5. Prayer and meditation.

I always do this at the start and end of my day. I ask my higher power to help me stay sober. At the end of the day, I thank my higher power for keeping me sober. I meditate once or twice daily as well.

6. Reading outside recovery literature.

There's plenty online and in local bookstores. I prefer hard copies and keep them at my work desk to crack open throughout the day. It keeps me focused on my recovery.

7. Eating healthy and exercising.

This is something I really benefit from. I notice my overall sense of well being is better when I eat healthy and exercise.

8. Obtaining adequate sleep.

The better my sleep, the better I perform during the day at work and with my wife and children. Additionally, stress is typically not as high when I'm obtaining adequate sleep.

9. Being of service to all NoFap Members.

Similar to welcoming new comers, being available to others in this community has drastically enhanced my recovery. It's incredibly rewarding and also helps to keep me sober.

These are a few of the things I stay 100% consistent with everyday. As a result, I'm still sober after almost 90 days...which is a damn miracle for an addict like me.

On a side note, I also get therapy once a week. I know you mentioned you currently don't see a therapist, but I would highly recommend seeing a therapist in tandem...maybe one who specializes in sex addiction. It could definitely benefit you more than you think...especially in tandem with this community. My only suggestion is to be aware that you may have to try a few out before you find a good fit.

Lastly, I'm always open for discussion via direct message.

Again, welcome to the community!