Rock Bottom - help

Wow what an incredible discussion, so much courage openmimdedness and love on the part of so many people. I am humbled that this site allows this to happen and me to join in.
I agree with so much of what has been said, especially the unconditional okness. We constantly worry and by we I mean human beings not just addicts, that we're bad, there something wrong with us, etc etc until we die. Thank fully there's a solution, it sounds very depressing but it's more like the concept of 'stoic'. I know I've felt that way thousands of times about feeling even minute attractions towards people that aren't my spouse, especially ones who aren't the same gender as me! Attraction that a lot of people are fine with or proud of I have a tendency to feel awful about, see the connection? We tend to not see the forest for the trees, there's that common saying that the devil is in the details, the bigger issue is shame. My experience is when that shame is transcended all the rest takes care of itself. I'm noticing that I can't say it any better than it's already been said so I'll just give a big +1

 

Good post and discussion here. I’ve questioned my sexual identity and had intrusive homosexual thoughts, and wondered about that, too. It’s helpful to realize they’re just thoughts. That’s it. The intrusive thoughts and craziness was pretty much in the drinking and drugging days, though, and (for myself) getting clean and sober, getting into fitness and meditation, helping others and trying to refrain from harming others, all these things helped eventually clear up that confusion. I actually worked through the sexual identity stuff with a therapist, and it was surprising that it didn’t take much more than some pointed questions by him. The suffering we put ourselves through sometimes, man it is so tough. We can be so hard on ourselves. Forgiveness and letting are so good when I practice them. It’s good to know we can heal from pretty much any physical and emotional illness. But these types of thoughts, and identification with these thoughts, OCD type stuff, it can be sooo difficult and paralyzing. For me, if I’m doing my best to do the right thing and trying to make amends when I mess up, overall my mind gets more clarity, I feel less shame and guilt, and make progress, even though it’s sloooooow at times. The more we’re clean from any addiction, I think the more clarity we have, and less suffering. It’s a difficult process, but thankfully we’re not alone. Good luck everyone, don’t believe everything you think (I’m pretty sure the mind is often a liar) and keep on keepin on!