questions about masturbation habbits

When I masturbate it is more comfortable to use a piece of fabric clothing or plushie to get off my partner does not have a problem with me masturbating so long as I only use my hands does anyone have any advice is this a problem or is my partner overreacting
update a little bit of additional info most times that this has happened was while I was mostly asleep due to a sleep disorder

 

first my partner identifies as male and uses he/him pronouns second there are times where sex is off the table for example when our kids wont go to sleep there are more examples but I wont go into them

 

because it is a problem for my partner it makes them feel insecure and worthless when I use anything but my hands to masturbate

 

i am not happy most of the time no. most of the time I am doing everything around the house including chores childcare cooking laundry etc. and whenever I try to bring up my issues I get told that they are unable to help because of depression, that they need their electronics because it helps keep them calm or they will bring up my struggles to break my porn addiction alongside the time I cheated on him which instantly shuts me down because I know I was in the wrong for both those problems

 

because we are working to make our relationship last

 

he is though his therapist seems really focused on his "eating disorder" rather than his mental health