Posting for the first time ever, hoping my involvment in the comunity will make my progress easier

Long time lurker here. Im starting my reebot (again)and am posting for the first time to hopefully help prevent me from relapsing.
Sharing my story if anyone cares.

So im 21 and have been addicted to porn for the entirety of my teenage years. At my worst I would jerk off up to 5 times a day. Constantly watching porn really became something competely normal for me. I always knew I had a problem but at the same time never thought of it being that much of a big deal since everyone was doing it and I didn’t really think it impacted my sexual health in any major way. I would still get horny, fantasise about real girls my age ect. It never ever crossed my mind that something like ED could ever happen to me. Until I tried to have sex for the first time that is. I couldn’t get hard pretty much at all, although I thought the girl I was with was really hot. Idk if all of it is the porn’s fault, since I was in a terrible state of mind at the time(severe depression and anxiety) and only really did it to get it over with. But nevertheless porn was surely a huge contributing factor. It was by far the most embarasing thing to have ever happend to me and It took me a really long time to get over the shame and trauma it caused me. I still sometimes dream of not being able to get it up and have been afraid of sex ever since(another thing I could have never even imagined happening to me before). That was the time I finally realised how severe my addiction really was and how serious the conscequences were. I have been actively trying to quit porn ever since but have been only partially successful. I haven’t mastrubated in over 2 months and have had porn free periods on and off. I also dramatically reduced my porn consumption and don’t really watch it anymore. I look at pictures most of the time. But I always end up making excuses for myself and start peeking and edging again. I haven’t been able to stay porn free for a long enough time to fully reboot. My record is around 30 days. My morning wood is mostly back and I am in a much better place than I used to be but I’m still nowhere near where I would like to arrive. Porn and instagram and such have severely damaged my perception of women and reduced the amount of things that turn me on dramatically. I developped a bimbo fetish and don’t really get turned on by real life women that surround me that aren’t dramatically oversexualised anymore. It’s like I completely lost my sensibility of the subtler things and interpersonal dynamics and kinda only measure women based on the size of their tits. Things that used to matter and turn me on/attract my attention really don’t anymore. I also don’t really see women as complete and complex people when it comes to sex anymore. It’s really horrible and I feel terrible about myself being this way. I crave the daily virtual fix of porn/hot women. Even if it’s just a few minutes of edging a day. Even if I dont indulge of lenghty binges of mastrubation untill all life has been drained out of me anymore. Porn is still a deeply engrained part of my everyday, my sexuality and the way I function as a whole. It drilled it’s roots way fucking deeper, than I thought at first. It completely ruined and distorted my sexuality. I used to be a normal horny teenager that was fascinated by sex and discovered that the internet provides an unlimited amount of it, which seemed like discovering el dorado at the time. Now I am a sexually frustrated unsatisfied young adult full of insecurities, shame, distorted fetishes and standards real women could never meet. And i have sex with a screen instead of real women. It’s just so tragic. I still can’t believe I fell this low. It’s something I never ever thought could happen to me yet here I am. Embarassed, full of shame and afraid of sex. What was once the most exciting thing I deeply desired, is now a total nightmare. I feel like a total looser. I’m starting my reboot and abstaining from porn(again). My goal is to make it to new year without peeking or edging. Without porn or any kind of sexual content being involved in my life in any form at all. This is my testament. I hope that making this post will help me commit harder and not make excuses. It’s not my first time trying this and I know how fucking hard it is. But I must be strong. Any support would be greatly appreciated. I’m really glad I can be a part of this awesome comunity.