I've heard all kinds of statistics of P-addicted men in the Church. Some as high as 70% of all Christian men and 50% of pastors. I don't know how reliable these statistics are and it's such an unspoken thing for many in Church. I have come out of the closet and let my mates know about my battle, yet I don't even know how clean these men are themselves. Do any of the Church-going Christian men who are fighting the good fight of sexual purity have any first-hand information or experiences they would like to share about fighting this sin among brethren?
I can't really comment on this. It's something I'll help a fellow brother with and try to conquer it with the help of God, but otherwise I'm not the know-it-all when it comes to the statistics and evidence.
Agreed. But why does it bother you what other people do or don't do in your church. We each carry our own load.
I'm not asking about my Church in particular, I want to know how prevalent the problem is in the universal Church. I think caring about other people's struggles is a must for any Christian, in or even out of the community - Would you be asking this same question if I asked "what are the statistics of homelessness" on a homelessness forum? Church isn't just a place where you meet every Sunday and make potato salad for the occasional picnic. Ideally it's a congregation of repentant sinners who worship God and hold accountability for eachother. Are you a Christian? I just think this mentality should be kind of obvious for Christians. As for what we do or don't do I think any Christian would be concerned if there were too much sexual perversion and too little worship, prayer and outreach in the Church. This stuff really matters to the Church universal and the local communities.
@IGY Not sure if you meant to, but you hinted at a scripture that confuses me, about bearing your own load in Galations 6. In those same verses, it mentions that we should "bear one another's burdens" but also that "each will have to bear his own load." I can't figure out if those are connected at all or if the context changes between verse 2 and verse 5. Anyway @Elduderino I agree it's sometimes hard thinking about being the one to confess a sin when others probably plan to hide it forever. A church is meant to be a rehab for sinners, not a country club for saints bragging about how saved they are.
Well I think it is safe to assume that if they are not talking about it there are likely many ppl in the church struggling with it. I don't think this sin is any less in the church than out of it. I am also of the opinion that you can kinda tell. This is a dangerous game of course. But my first interest in this was aroused by meeting a group of young lay-consecrated-catholics, they are monks of a sort, but they live "in the world" e.g. have regular jobs wear normal clothes etc. however they have taken an oath of chastity. These guys were very free and joyful in a way you rarely experience in men. For sure their practice of faith is a factor, but I somehow intuited the chastity part was a really big deal. And I feel that to a degree I can confirm this. I just in general feel more solid and carefree than I did in the past. And I suspect that when I don't it is likely the side effect of having indulged in sexual thoughts, or leered at some women... or just having slipped in the daily disciplines I needed to fiercely maintain while I was rebooting... Anyway I think for many of us the next call to action is to come forward about this and be a force of positive change in our communities
Those two verses are very much in context. I like the country club image haha! I imagine smug guys in polo shirts and vests saying word for word "I am so saved". Comical.
Thanks, I see your point of view. I was just puzzled because of your wish to know the statistics of parishioners and pastors. I cannot imagine that it is possible to gather such data. As you said, you have just come out of the closet. I would imagine the majority of those engaging with this remain in the closet, so even if this data were available it would be utterly inaccurate.
Today at church one of the young men came forward and admitted to sexual immorality, and told everyone that he is now a father, in addition to some struggles with alcoholism. I was impressed and I don't think many people are willing to do that kind of thing. Makes me feel lame to hide my struggles from everyone.
Hallelujah! What a brave spirit God had given him! That brings me so much joy to know that the Holy Spirit is working in men like him, confessing his subsequent problems as an alcoholic. May God help you care for this man.
Yes, it was a reference to Galatians chapter 6. Paul wrote to the Galatians: “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2) Here for “burdens” the apostle used baʹre, the plural form of baʹros, a Greek word always used to denote something burdensome or heavy. Certainly the sin and hence the burden of someone that “is caught in a sin” (referred to in the preceding verse) would not be light but heavy. However, in verse 5 the apostle states: “for each one should carry their own load,” that is, his load of responsibility. For “load” Paul here used the Greek word phor·tiʹon, signifying something that is to be borne or carried, without any reference to the weight of the thing. So he drew a distinction between “burdens” and “load” in these verses. This would indicate that if a Christian got into spiritual difficulty that was very hard for him to bear, fellow believers would aid him, thus helping to bear another’s burden. This harmonizes with what Paul had just said, as recorded in Galatians 6:1, about endeavouring to “restore that person gently.” Yet, as the apostle proceeded to show, bearing the burdens of one another does not mean carrying another person’s load of spiritual responsibility to God. In the same context, Paul makes clear that “If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves.” The apostle urged Christians “Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else.” (Galatians 6:3, 4) It was then that the apostle observed that “each one should carry their own load” of responsibility before God.
Say the 70 and 50 percents are true - it shows that no matter what our faith or identity, none of us are completely impervious to suffering and addiction. Hopefully for those people of faith that are suffering they find the right support and are not ridiculed or shunned.
Ppl who do not comprehend this problem are everywhere.... and shunning and ridiculing in general are far more common outside established religious institutions in my experience.
I asked my pastor and he was so awesome about it. He's really like an older brother. He said he thinks the percentage of men in Church who PMO is only slightly less than outside of Church and of course this is much much higher than we would hope. I told him I was on day 44 of a 90 day cleanse routine suggested by an online community of men also willing to break free from PMO. He was amazed at my effort and said being part of this community is really proactive. The part that shocked him the most was that this is a secular forum. Looks like we got catching up to do guys.
Yeah this is really something important to keep in mind. It is easy to lose hope in the general goodness and the general humanity of ppl as things just seem to only be getting worse... but then a positive backlash happens... like this community.... and it helps everyone.
